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I just came to find this website and I'm in a desperate need of someone's help . Even a few words matter to me . I hope you read about my concerns and excuse my moderate english as it's not my maternal language .
I'm in my last year of high school . This is the last summer holidays i can spend as a high schooler . i can't seem to understand my feelings. i'm from Tunisia and my country has a really unique studying system . During the 6th and 9th grade , students take an exam and if they pass , they attend a pioneer elementary /high school of which the studying system and exams are way harder than normal schools . I'm a student at one of my countries top highschool not to say the top one . And i could say i never stressed over studying like i did during the last two years. My mind is filled with concerns and im just too scared of what is awaiting me.
Normally students of my highschool are expected to succeed with really high scores . And Im gonna explain how grading goes . we have to take exams in Arabic French English , another language which is spanish for me , Philosophy , Informatics , Maths , Physics , chemistry and Biology (these are the subjects for those who majored in Mathematics or Science as i did ) . Each subject is graded on 20 if you get a grade under 10 then it's really bad , if it's from 11 to 14 then it's still bad but acceptable , if it's from 15 to 17 then it's good and from 18 to 20 it's excellent . Then they calculate the total and its average and you get your "Bachelor score" on 20 too .
As i said i'm a student of a top school so i'm supposed to get a really high score that goes from 16 to 19 (as 20 is impossible to reach XD) . But my family expects me to get a really high score like at least 18 out of 20. To be honest i , as well expect and want to get such a score but Its really hard .And can you imagine how much pressure is put on me throughout these years .
In my country it's a really normal thing to have tutoring in several subjects . And during the last year of high school , we have to get extra courses in every single subject we are supposed to take in the bachelor exam (we call it BAC in our country) . However because the time tables during the scholar year don't allow tutoring in each subject , we do some tutoring during summer holidays such as Language tutoring and informatics .
Now that i explainedhow things go on ,let's talk about my concerns . First my last year teachers all warned us about studying too much during the holidays. They tol us that the last year of high school is really long and you ll be overly stressed during the scholar year so you should rest well during holidays . BUT I WON4T BE ABLE TO . The holidays started on the 27th of May and we go back to study on the 15th of September .I enrolled in french classes during June and i have an upcoming test on the 26th of June . Keep in mind that these french courses have nothing to do with my 13th year french program . It's just an extra exam that i need for university . it's called DALF C1 and it's really hard to pass it . i mean not that hard but not easy as well . As a result i will have to work really hard during June .On top of that i have spanish classes starting the 10th of July until 12th august . Then during aout until i don't know when in September i will have Informatics classes.Then at the beginning of september i will have maths physics and chemistry extra classes to refresh the mind after a holymoly rest . I don't plan on neglecting any of the subjects and i have to do my best and work hard during the holidays . But i'm scared of feeling so tired and giving up during the half of my scholar year . During this year (12th grade) , at around february i went through a slump and i was so overwhelmed . It was really hard to go through it and i was so stressed . I'm afraid of going through the same process tis year and ruining the exam which will literally determine my future.
i don' t know what to do and i have no one to talk to about this . I'm really scared ...
Of course this isn't everything , my second concern is about my bestfriend . She is great at studying to and i can't help but compare myself to her when studying. I can't keep a distance from her and we've already enrolled in the same courses so Facing her is impossible for me to avoid. The thing about comparing is that during tutorig whenever she solves something i just get blocked , i start blaming myself , hating myself , thinking im stupid . This may sound ridiculous and i tried to get over it but in vain. Moreover , im supposed to focus really well during tutoring but i can't do it because she is with me . I told her about this and she said she has the same problem as she constantly compares herself to me so that was of nohelp. I really started hating myself for doing this . It's so ridiculous and stupid . I want to stop but how?
Along this , i have trouble with keeping up a good studying rythym. In my country we study from Monday to thursday from 8 to 5pm with only one hour break for lunch and on friday and saturday we study from 8 to 1pm. As i live far away ; i have to get up at 6 and leave the house at 7 then i come home at around seven .
oh and the last year i had extra tutoring on friday until 8pm and on sunday from 8 to 5pm as well .
When i come home , i feel so tired that i end up sleeping . But there is so much homework to do and the tutor give us even more work to do . I didn't have any tricks to deal with my sleeping habit . I know you could say why fight sleep if you're tired . But I'm not completely tired i know i could go on a bit more but i don't , i don' t feel like studying at all. I tend to lose motivation real quick and as i love listenig to music an dancing . It gets in the way of studying i spend around two hours dancing then go to sleep . I tried to stop this by going to sleep early and waking up at 3am to do homework but i felt really exhausted when going to school and by the time lunch break finishes i couldn't focus anymore on afternoon classes so i stopped doing that. Then i tried to sleep right when i go home and wake up at 10pm but i coudn't , i'd go on with sleeping . I also started studying during the lunch break and swallowing up my lunch 10minutes before going to class and it was good , i guess!
But then starting april i lost all my motivation to study like seriously i prepared to my finals during the lunch break only . I went unprepared mentally and physically to many of my exams . I managed to pass but I need to stop this .
I want to find some motivation tips and a way to study during the night .
A few more concerns considering the midterm holidays . Actually we have a two-weeks holidays during December for the new eve and another two-weeks holidays during march . I was told that students on their last year study during these holidays but i tried it and i was unable to . No matter how much i tell myself to go and study i end up procrastinating. And i was wondering if i should really self-study during these holidays ? and if yes how much ? I don't know who to ask tho..
Besides i was wondering about studying techniques , for example i spend too much time writing the notes and i end up not reading them. I was wondring about what method would be the best , is it doing exercices then writing notes or vice-versa.Should i write notes or flashcards or just read through my textbook and the notes given by the teachers.
In addition to that , i came to realize that i basically spend my time studying for maths physics chemistry and bilology i end up neglecting other subjects and studying them the night of the exam if not the day of the exam.
Another thing is cocerning the planner , i used to have a planner but then i became too lazy to plan and i would just do my homework according to my mind . but i want to go back to planning because i remember getting lost and forgetting whether i write some notes or not , whether i did some exercices or not . so im curious about which planning method actually works the best, monthly weekly daily or what. And do you know any good planners or printables please? i wonder to who am i addressing this but im doing it anyway.
Now the last thing which is my biggest concern . In fact my dream , the reason why i work so hard is because i want to study in Canada. The problem is my family is not well off and we don't have enough financial resources which could allow me to go study in there. My country doesn't give scholarships to Canada and most importantly the scholarship is givet o students who have the best scores which is like 19.5 out of 20 or more. My mom seriously expects me to receive a scholarship but it's not as easy as she thinks and i don't think i will be able to have such a score with the procrastination i have . i wish i could for real ... Studying in Canada has been my dream since i was little but money is in the way. I truly don't feel like giving up my dream but it seems like the whole world is telling me to so should i ? i was always told that i should put my feet on earth and stop dreaming of such things but i desperatley continue dreaming of it .
That was it , my concerns at the age of 18 a lot is still awaiting me and im here overthinking my present and my future .It was really nice to empty my mind and just talk about this .Hopefully someone will notice this and if you did then thank you , you're the first one tonotice me and im so grateful for that !
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Wow! I feel overwhelmed reading about your life. I can't even imagine how you cope. I suddenly glad to have gone to an American school, where so much isn't expected. I kind of relate in the way that I felt really burned out at university, but I had more breaks than you, by far. I honestly don't know how you to do it all. Sorry I can't answer your questions. All I can say, is you need a break if that's possible at all, because you really will be burned out by the time school starts again. Please take it easy when possible.
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