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oh my gosh i can feel myself turning into a horrible person. i have daddy issues, and i know it's no excuse but i hope it's some kind of justification for why I'm feeling this, and not just that I'm awful.
lately I've been feeling the urge to wreak havoc on people. I'm not sadistic, i don't like seeing people hurting. it's not like i wanna destroy their lives, it seems to be a playing with their feelings thing. mainly guys. i want male attention, but i don't want sex or nudes. I'm not comfortable with those yet, considering I'm only a junior is high school. the worst part is that i want older men, like 30 and below to notice me. i find myself acting seductive, making myself look good for them. i recently went to my friends house where her mom's boyfriends was over. i caught him looking at my butt and i felt exhilarated. they're not happy together so i used that to justify it. i don't wanna have sex with them obviously. i just wanna flirt and make them notice me. not the happy couples though. and it's weird cause i don't wanna do that to people my age. just older couples. (again 30 and under.) it's just fun to me. it makes me feel powerful. i know it's dangerous and I'm scared of what i might provoke and do. am i hopeless? how do i stop?
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Hi, i would say don't tell anyone this but obviously you won't since i don't know you.
I never felt like i have daddy issues but when i go to describe what i want in a partner sometimes i hear myself. Like someone older than me. I had that same exhilarating feeling when i caught my brothers 28 year old roommate looking at my breasts. He never did it again but part of me want him to. And actually I've hardcore flirted with my sister's boyfriend before. (I'm a junior in High school and he's in his second year of college). Actually we ended kissing one time when we were alone. We sweared never to do it again and we haven't. We know we crossed a line. But I've felt that slight want to make men like 20-30 look at you. I kinda stopped wanting it to happen when I realized what i was doing... Idk if that helps but one guy almost tried to act on what i did, and i immediately stopped from that experience. I kind of rambled, but I'm still gonna post the comment
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