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I just kinda felt bad. I just went in the other bathroom and turned on the fan and nobody questioned it. I threw up like two or three times but barely anything came up. I think I just have to throw up closer to when I actually eat for it to be effective. Now my tongue and throat kinda burn. I also just feel like trash in general for absolutely no freaking reason. I want to self-harm again. Either cutting or burning, I don't care, but I can't because it's summer and I want to wear short sleeves. I want someone to come into my bedroom and ask if I'm okay. But they won't because we all just went to bed and I would just say I'm fine anyways. Even if I said I wasn't I don't know what I'd say. I couldn't talk about it. Ughhh. I wish there was something I could take to just sleep immediately because I'm tired but I don't feel like sleeping and I just feel gross. And my stomach kinda hurts. I don't know if I even really do feel bad or if I'm just lying to myself and being dramatic. It sure feels real.stre
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