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To isolate for a week? Okay. Rarely come out of the room? Okay. Say you're sleeping when in fact you're watching TV? Okay, make sure to set up a DO NOT DISTURB sign. Now, if you're leaving the room just to treat me like shit, where's the fun in waking up everyday then? When things are like this, how can I think this will get better or at least believe it?
You're doing this, so this is totally fine. Now, if it was me, you'd be freaking out like you always do. Then, look at yourself before accusing me or my dad of not giving a shit about you.
You push us away and don't even have a decency to look back, you prefer to act like you're untouchable, always right and no one ever can tell otherwise (you don't accept). Why act like a Superior being? Why things have to be your way? Why do we have to lower our heads to you all the time? It's not something that happened months ago or weeks, I'm talking about an entire life. Do you even know what it is? For you this is nothing, just like anything else 'cause only your point of view matters, the rest is trash. It's so easy to silence others, including me, shouting at them "grow up!' when we're not the ones acting like a spoiled child, immature princess, brat, whatever this is called.
Want to talk? No, not gonna happen. You don't tolerate being exposed, seeing your flaws being pointed out. Only you can do it, it's fun when you have full power over the situation, as soon things change you start making threats, talk too loud and leave the room. Last time, you even tried to physically assault me, did you think I forgot this? Think I'm scared of you? This is what you want, you still think I'm a 6 year old who you can control through fear and violence also called "discipline by force". I stood by myself, finally. Managed to grab your arm, you saw yourself powerless for the first time, in your outburst it was too much, right?
You dislike that I'm getting along with my dad? You want everything just for you until you decide to ditch and seek "something better"? Two faced, always poisoned me against my dad and vice versa, then you were talking about respecting him 'cause you're done with him talking your ears out that you're not being a good mom.
Who are you? Can you answer this without drama? Without playing the "misunderstood and taken for granted" role? Can you realize how toxic you've been?
I wish this year ends soon... I know I'll miss out lots of things by thinking this way. It's hard to deal with you, now. Almost unbearable, it wears me out. You say things have nothing to do with me, you and dad will solve... No, so far you didn't solve anything. It's impossible to sit down and talk, I see, been there too. Now, you want my brothers to come here so there will be a decent talk? What is decency? What is being a civilized person? You won't tolerate when they express their opinions, you'll accuse them of siding with dad 'cause "men sides with men". You don't even see them as humans who can think for themselves, you discard this and use this gender BS to 'prove' you're right. Don't expect pity from me, 'cause you're not doing your part. You expect an automatic pleasing 'cause you want it and that's final.
Things don't work like this, you should have known. Why do you act like only you know what's right and what's better if you refuse to reflect your acts?
Older and wiser? No, Tyrant and Narcissus.
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