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I just can't anymore for real, it's just so hard. My life is. Truly an mess man.. I keep tryin and trying and nothing is ever enough for anyone, I give all my love but it's not enough like seriously if anyone's thinks I'm fake their for real dumb because people have destroyed me, I have always showed positivity and love and ive always dreamt of having an best friend that truly loves me and I can show them all the love I got to give, because I have a LOTS of love, I don think know but people taking me really for granted like.. ive finally learnt my lessons and it's how this world is fked up and evil, I thought loving people Andy being nice too much and like being there for people was alright, but ive learnt that you need to shut up and be selfish in this world to be liked a little at least, you have to be perfect and hot and boys need to run after you and you have to be hard to get and stuff, but I've always just showed love but it's not enough, it's bad like it's wrong to show love. I don't know this'll society is fked up af... I've ALWAYS been the class clown ONLY to make people laugh and have fun, little didn't I know that they were laughing AT me.. ive understood everything now. People an society have really changed me and made me more depressed, I can't be myself frr.. I hate this'll world and I hate people. Tbh I hope an apocalypse will come like an zombie apocalypse and all people die, especially I hope mean and bad people die the worst death. I reallyyy hate people. I'm not even crying anymore because of how much pain I feel. I'm just quiet and dead inside with no feelings anymore.the old me is dead, and I'm not an person inside anymore. I'm dead inside. I don't even have an humor anymore and I'm not "nice" to people like I used to, I don't even care about people's feelings. They can go to hell
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You are definitely not alone in this. Time and time again I see people left and right lose love for others because they had not received it back. Though I may not understand everything you're feeling, I'm very sorry to hear you are feeling like you've lost a sense of yourself to those who had drained you.
If you wish to pull yourself away from others for a while, perhaps you can find a hobby you enjoy to yourself so you can revive your feelings toward life. And, when that time comes to where you are comfortable, you can find people who have the same interests as you.
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