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So for about a month I've been friends with a girl I met here on this site. She is nice and funny.
But there is a bit of a problem we are having and I hope all of you reading can help me. Maybe those who are active here can recognize us lol.
Okay so I don't have any experience in friendship because it is my first time and honestly I talk so much with her that not a day has gone without us talking on different topics. Most of the time she makes posts here and I comment starting a discussion while sometimes I'm do the same.
She has had a bad experience with friends many times and is very paranoid about making friends. And for the last few days we have been arguing a lot over our friendship.
Yeah I've been a bad friend because one time I made fun of her and stuff.
But she is special to me. I don't know how to describe it but she is someone I don't want to lose.
I have other friends too but when I'm with her online here I feel something else that I don't feel with my other friends.
What is this feeling?
She has been telling me to forget her and not talk to her because she doesn't think there's any point in being friends with someone like her. She thinks I'm a bit of a fake friend and she doesn't want to get hurt again. I do understand that but I don't want to break up like that.
Why?
I donno know.
I don't want to lose her.
Please advise me.
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Do you think it could be a romantic attraction?
ReplyWho knows? I haven't met her anytime. We just friends here on Novni. But maybe? Can you fall for someone you've never seen?
ReplyDefinitely. Appearance doesn't matter as much as everyone says it does, you can fall for someone based on their personality, and what's on the inside.
ReplyI never thought of that. But we live like in the corners of this planet and I'm super shy. But how do I save this friendship regardless of me loving her or not?
ReplyI would say just talk to her, but you already responded to that. Friendship is hard, so I'd suggest just trying to power through the rough spots, because that's what makes a friendship valuable.
ReplyLike what? I didn't understand. How should I make her be friends with me? She doesn't think it's worth.
ReplyTry telling her how you feel
ReplyI did >_< and we are still friends. She understands but still there is this stuff needing to be sorted out.
ReplyWouldn't she just read this post here?
ReplyIt's all right if she does. I hope she does and understand my feelings.
ReplyThere are various ways to make friends and I wouldn't have thought Novni would be one of those ways. I like my anonymity when I'm here. Personally, I'm not here to make friends. Sure, you shouldn't have made fun of her but it was one time, right? The best apology you can give is to never do it again. That will show that you are genuinely sorry. It sounds like a lot of drama and you have to ask yourself if she is worth it. If you can't think about her without feeling that lump in your throat and your chest aching, it's usually a bad sign. In my experience, anyway. Every friend I had that had this effect on me, I ended up losing or walking away from. Everyone has been hurt by someone. Those who are hurting end up hurting others. You need to decide if it is worth feeling like shit everyday. I don't know how old you are, but I don't expect you to heed my advice. People who are important now won't be that important later on. You'll eventually stop missing them. Someone else will fill her spot. You need to realise now that you have told everyone that the issue is with someone on this site. They are now in the spotlight against their will. You should always seek advice, but never EVER compromise someone else's privacy while you're at it. You admit that you and your friend could be recognised. So step 1, don't do this again. If you have to, omit details. I don't need to know how you know this person, all I need to know is you need help. Give them time, give them space and don't obsess over them. Do something for yourself. Watch a good show, read a good book and let them come to you. If they don't, move on. Stop torturing yourself. Hope this was in some way helpful.
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