I love you.

Dear Jared,

I do not know how to describe my feelings anymore.

Every time I think of you I would just start crying a lot, even though I am at work, at school, in the middle of a crowd... I cannot help myself. You came into my life once, and I have fallen deeply in love with you.

We used to meet each other everyday. You sat beside me in class, making me laugh with your lame jokes, but I always enjoyed them. You surprised me sometimes with treats, with my favourite drinks and I am so grateful of having you in my life. We used to do everything together, going out for films, sitting and chilling at Starbucks, doing anything you like.

I miss you so much, I want nothing but you. Please come back, I cannot live a day without you. I feel like nothing is more important than you anymore right now. I am crying so hard every day, and I cannot stop. It has been weeks since we parted, I am struggling to live my life without having you by my side. Jared, I am not going to anonymise your name because I want everyone to read this. I want you to see this. I love you so much and please, I want to see you again.

I have lost my purpose to live when you are gone. Everything seems so sad to me, everything around me. Walking past Starbucks, I would cry because we always hung out there. Looking at happy couples on the street, I sob because we used to be like them. Sometimes I manage to stop crying because my eyes are already dried out. You cannot imagine how painful it is, as I am sitting here writing this, hoping that you could feel what I am feeling.

I keep all our photos in my phone, but I do not dare to open and see them. I am afraid that my tears would fall again, even though I am always crying secretly at random times in each day. I would never get used to this, I would never live a normal day if you are not around. I admit I have become dependent on you and I am constantly thinking about you every minute, every second. I wish somebody here could understand how I feel right now.

I cannot go on any further. I have a lot to say, but it hurts so much to even think of it. I love you, Jared. I love you so much.

我一直都很爱你，我真的不能没有你。我永远都无法学会好好渡过每一个没有你的日子，永远无法适应我生命里从此缺少了最重要的一部分。

Again, I am not going to anonymise my name too.

Affectionately,

Chelsea.