Where to go?

I want to write as bad as I want to breath, I want to express myself and my art, my thought process and I feel like I’ve been held back. Held back by life by people by friends, sometimes even at times family. I want to express myself and never have to worry about what other people are thinking, or how others are looking at me. Why am I always stuck doing something I don’t want to do, I understand in life sometimes you have to do things you don’t want to do. But and especially recently it seems to be in full effect. I’ve written short stories and even poems; I’ve even started the beginnings of a novel. But I have no clear direction and where to go from here.