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So..I'm talking to this guy who is 30 (I'm 19) and we've been talking for 3 weeks now. We seem to get along and chat great. BUT, one thing I can't stop thinking about is how to tell him I'm a virgin... He's the first guy I have talked to that hasn't been a complete asshole or creep so far, and I don't want him to ditch me because I'm a virgin. I'm so nervous because he is most likely more experienced in that field. Should I wait to tell him until the need or should I be upfront now?
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Be upfront about it, it shouldn't matter if you're a virgin or not. There are so many other wonderful things about a relationship, that it would be foolish to end a relationship because of that. Remember to stay true to yourself and always be honest. You'll be a lot happier that way. Best of luck!
ReplyThat's quite a big age gap considering the fact you are only nineteen. Age gaps become less of an issue the older the youngest person gets in relation to the older person. Do you need to tell him at all, about your sexual status? It's only three weeks. Why not get to know each other and build up a relationship. There will more more respect and trust if you do that, if he isn't a selfish jerk and only is after one thing. He's probably rubbing his hands in glee at catching a young naive thing who writes to anonymous boards for advice. If you were a mature enough adult, you would know how to approach this situation in a natural way because you would feel comfortable in doing it. As he's older than you and probably more experienced in life and sexual matters, have you really got fundamental things in common. Doesn't seem like it.
ReplyHe will probably not leave you fur that. Men tend to prefer woman who have had less experiences with other men, it gives them the feeling that you're really something special that only they have ever experienced. My advice is if talk about sex comes up or when you get to that point just tell him. He's 30 so he should have the experience to take the lead from you
ReplyIt's best just to be honest about stuff. He'll probably understand.
Replyi think you should be upfront and tell him, if he likes you for you this wont matter. i think you should take things slow and build a relationship. age doesn't matter so you do you
ReplyIt's good that you've found someone you connect well with. I really don't think it will be a big deal when it comes down to it. I think that he will be surprised but I don't think he will just ditch you because of it. I think that you can just give it time and get to know him more. Sex isn't everything in a relationship the person matters more. Hope everything goes well for you
Replyyou should just wait
ReplyHey so, similar case with me. I am talking to this guy for 3 weeks. He is 29, and I am 21. I am a virgin and he obviously is not. I have talked to him about this before and he said he will wait and if I can’t give it to him, then he won’t take it. But right now, we are thinking to spend next week Saturday at his apartment. We have made out really bad last time so definitely will end up making out again. But I have already decided to tell him that I am not ready yet and I can’t give my virginity to him. Call me old-fashioned or whatever I don’t want to have sex with someone before marriage. So yeah, tell him what you think and if he understands and respect you, he’ll stay.
ReplyIk my comment will be out of the topic but why the frick you want to give your virginity to someone you are talking for only 3 weeks? Yeah you two have a connection and all but isn't that to early to say that he's different from other guys? If I were you, I will wait for marriage. Your virginity will be one of the most precious things you will give for your future husband so don't give it to anyone you're unsure of. He's 30 years old, maybe he done it with other youngster too? You will never know and don't trust that much sheesh you just met him like 3 weeks, it gonna take long than that to know his true colors. It's not a big deal to if a woman is virgin, it will turn them on even more tbh because you will be there 'first'. Wait after marriage then have sex
ReplyYou need to be upfront about it and let him know that sex may not be something you are willing to do yet (if this is true for you). And for a guy who is 30 years old talking to a 19 year old??? Honestly, most of the time, they want sex... sex with a young woman.. My virginity was stolen from a 31 year old who I thought was cool... but I was naive. Please do not be dumb like I was. Be careful and be safe.
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