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Recently these days,
I want to bang my head against a wall,
until it cracks open like a melon,
then I can drown in my own blood,
then I will be happy because I will feel nothing.
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Melon II
Before these days,
I wanted to curl up in a ball,
To die in my sleep,
Now I crave something more,
Painful,
Because I know I am a terrible,
person,
I hate,
I envy,
I complain,
I chase perfection,
Then I die.
ReplyThese past years
I've felt the same hurt
The same unspeakable pain
It's like nothing about you is good
And you know it's just in your brain
But you crave the bad thoughts
And the sleepless nights
Because without them
It just wouldn't feel right
You think that all that's left
Is an empty shell
Filled with regret
But even in that shell
Although it looks so empty
And the pain is screaming
A star is shining
Inside it's gleaming
But you just can't see it
Let alone believe it
Because words are just words
And It probably doesn't matter what i say
But why would I go out of my way
To stop the bullet from hitting
The room from spinning
It's because even though we're strangers
Probably miles apart
I want to gift you a piece of my heart
It is so hard to see
Because the pain is blinding
Thoughts rewinding
The same hate over again
Keeping yourself in
A bird locked away with a key
You are the only one who can set yourself free
Flying with the wind
Soaring above the trees
You have so much potential
And so much worth
Even from birth
That smile of yours could light up the room
And chase away gloom
You matter so much
And you are enough
You've probably heard the saying
Don't give up
And it is so hard to trust
Because it hurts too much
To even think of surviving
When it seems you are dying
Even in a melon
With a green bitter shell on
Inside lies potential that nothing else can claim
ReplyWe crave the pain
Because we fear there is nothing else
Relying on these hurtful labels that we wear ourselves
It's handmade
And fits like a glove
But It's just to easy to believe we're not enough
You crave the pain
Because you think you deserve it
But do you think the pain is really worth it
Before you were a seed
And you think that you're done
But you are still growing
Progressing and getting stronger
You want the pain
Because you think that's all you have
Our brains are trained to look at the bad
You are so special
So worthy and unique
Even if that's something that you cannot see
Everyone has imperfections
The "bad traits"
The flaws
But chasing those "wrongs"
Just builds up a wall
You are just hurting
And you blame yourself
But there is always a way out
Reply