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Every time I see you, every minute we spend together, every second I waste staring into your hazel, brown eyes, I feel a small piece of me slide into oblivion. Not because it hurts. Although it does hurt. It’s because I know, deep down inside, we’re not meant to be.
I want to be yours, so, so badly. Your beautiful, smart, funny, witty, you love trees, and flowers, your kind and gentle. Your great in bed and you have a fantastic body. You love the stars and the moon, astrology and smoke pot. Your soul is an essence that I can’t get enough of. You hate pickles, and your allergic to strawberry’s, you love musicals and the ocean. You love the ocean and animals, burgers, and your lactose intolerant, and your favorite flower is a sunflower (if you had to pick). This is just the tip of the ice berg when it comes to the things I know about you.
Yet, I know it’s all going to end. Forever is not my friend here, and the time we spend together will get less, and less, and less. This will continue to decline as I leave for work soon, and eventually, you’ll stop talking to me. You won’t miss me though. Why would you miss me? No one misses someone like me.
When that time ends, I will miss you. Yet, I’ll fade back into the abyss of numbness that I’ve been forced to feel for, so, so, so very long. The only thing that matters to me when that happens, is that your happy. I know you will be though. You’ll find your forever person, and, I’m happy for you that you will. Because it’s something you deserve.
I just wish, that I wasn’t going to Crawl back into my shell. If I don’t though, this world is going to crush me again, and I can’t be crushed any smaller then I’ve already been made.
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