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She was my first real girlfriend. I was 19. I really liked her. Was only with her for 4 months but somehow here I am at 22 and she still pops into my mind. I want to forget. I just can't. I never felt those feelings with anyone else yet. I haven't really even talked to other girls since. I have tried a handful of times but I had no luck. I mostly just shut myself off from the world. Everyone is freaking out because there is little face to face social interaction going on currently. For me? It's just another day. I feel no different cause even before this Corona virus I didn't go out much at all. I dont have friends to interact with. I don't even have a real job right now. I don't think I've had a friend since high school. It's a lonely world for me. Even though I crwve a connection with someone, I prefer being alone now. I'm just so comfortable when I'm alone. I've grown so used to it. I'm afraid this is how I'll be forever.
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