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hey , i dont know how to start this but i need to start from somewhere,right? i have been throught a lot since a little kid and i think thats why i am like this.I realized that all this started when i saw 8 years old , that was around 8 or less years ago i guess and that was the year when i started having anxiety but i didnt realized till now. Im just 16 years old now and im about to turn 17 but i dont feel happy anymore about nothing in my life .All that i feel is like i dont exists , like im numb somehow i dont know but for sure i know one thing , that im not alright how i was suppose to be . Now let me put you all up on something , i stay all night long up and sleep all day till around 5 or 6 pm in Europe . All night i overthink things , i push peope away , i for no reason start to cry , i think that one day im gonna go throught this and im gonna be fine but then i start to think that i dont deserve to live this life and when i mean this life i mean bad life . I start thinking that no matter how hard i try and pray and hope nothing is going to change cause of maybe i did something wrong that now im living this bad life that i have for now . All day i dont smile at all , but just in case of my mother of brother to not realize that im not okay i start to fake a smile just cause i dont want them to know nothing about what i feel or how i am . I know its wrong but at least i want them to be happy than me . I guess the fact that i overthink a lot made me like this , i think im not ok mentally and maybe physically but im just gonna try to hide it like i always did for years . I literally dont know what to do anymore i have trust issues, angry issues and more . I literally dont know how to deal with my self anymore , all these thoughts , the negative ones just made me feel insecure about myself , made me feel weak , made me feel lonely , made me push people away , made me feel nothing at all . Maybe i did some wrong things in my life and im sorry for that but still that doesnt make me change myself or feel better.
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Hello
You have been through a lot but remember that...
The brightest star shines in the darkest sky.
If their are cloud today, sun will surely rise up.
Don't lose hope and believe in yourself.
You will surely stand at a beautiful destination.
By the way, listening to piano might help at night ...try itππ
ReplyIt is unusual for a child as young as 8 to have anxiety. Do you recall what caused this? Please try to find the things in your life that you like and write a list of them so that you can feel happier. If you are overthinking you are spending too much time inside your head so keep yourself busy so that you aren't thinking so much. Also please play relaxation music and lie down, take deep breaths and relax yourself all over, then imagine yourself being in a calm, restful, peaceful place lying on a soft white cloud with not a worry in the world. Keep pushing any thoughts out and meditate. I sleep all day and am up all night too. Even when I sleep at night and am awake in the day my sleeping pattern always returns to sleeping in the day and being awake all night. It is very cold in the winter. If you keep feeling like this please see a doctor and remember to pray and talk to God every day because He will help you if you ask Him. When God does help you please keep Him in your life because He loves you.
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