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My Unsent Letter
1 week ago · · Writing Prompts · Explicit
Why did you tell me you loved me, are you innocent and you made a mistake or was those your intentions from the beginning? Why did you drag me along for 2 years, and lie to my face every chance you had, but when I would leave, you would try to kill yourself because you "couldn't live without me".
Out of all the ways you hurt me and out of all the times i had forgiven you, out of all our good and bad times I never wanted to leave you hurting, So I didn't and now every single day I think about the day I should have hurt you, the way you have hurt me.
Why couldn't you just leave me like an adult, why did you have to ruin my life... that day the first time you put your hands on me, you begged me not to call the cops , crying on your knees saying I would ruin your life , so I didn't.. that is what you turned around and did to me. When you and I both know that day I did nothing to aggravate you, I did nothing to make you feel in danger, you attacked me, and you called the cops when I defended myself.. maybe its my over thinking , but its almost as if you had planned this. You couldn't have me, so nobody could... or was it the fact that i was finally leaving to go be happy, and you couldn't fucking stand that.
The thought of you now is sickening , and most days i relive that day, the betrayal I felt, the embarrassment I felt , being locked away and treated like a criminal, and now I feel like that is all that's left to be, a criminal.
The days I was in holding, I couldn't help but feel hurt, because then I knew you never loved me, not even from the start I was just an easy target for you, somebody to use, somebody to manipulate and play your little mind games because if i even feel a pinch of love i fall flat on my face in love, and you seen that.
The trust issues you have given to me, is beyond me, I used to be so strong and now the only thing I can feel is anger. I've struggled with depression since I was a little kid and making it through my days were difficult, but now every day it just feels easier to end this now..
so let me start off by saying, if you come across some how and ever read this, 1) you will know who you are, and you will know who i am.
2) All I can wish is that karma comes back around and you get what you deserve, I hope for the rest of your life whatever happens you lay awake at night feeling all the pain I did, I hope you lay awake at night crying, unable to sleep, go through the same things I did.
3)messaging me now, after crashing my entire life, shows what a complete piece of shit you are, what makes you think we are anything close to being cool or friends ever again?