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Why does it never fail that my mom dad or both take their ill bitter ass attitude treatment out on me? Can i not get a break? Im almost always mellow and chill. Them on the other hand good gosh my dad would suck the joy out of a clown and make it cry. My dad is so unstable alot of times im afraid to live with him. When he wakes up he has an attitude from hell. Alot of times in the middle of the night his pot and cigarette smokers cough can be heard probably in a 2 block radius its so loud. Then he will grumble gripe and stomp through the house in a mean tone saying shit like " theres no cold water in the refrigerator fuck" or just things mocking me in a drunken stupor then turn around and deny saying it acting like im crazy for being woke up from all that necessary bullshit and calling mom names talking to her like a dog then gradually end up passing back out. Like i said im a chill mellow person as long as someone doesnt piss me off and screw me over so what on earth have i done to deserve this kind of treatment. Alot of times if im awake late like in the quarantine i will justgo get snacks or a drink quiet as a mouse. He however will act like king kong stomp slam things not caring he wakes me or not. Theres times he makes me afraid to live here he is so mentally unstable. Blames it on too much past lsd use. Bullcrap. Theres no excuse for treating your own family like crap because youre miserable it doesnt mean i want to be miserable too. Im a kind hearted person and would help anybody. And thats gotten me took advantage of in the past. My dadborrowed $20 said hed repay it next day. Next day came. Nope. I brought it up and told him his words and he just basicly acts like it doesntmatter and ok to go against his words by not repaying me by saying well I bought you this this and this. Thats not the point. Because if a neighbor does that to him (his acquaintance) he will get so angry take it out on us because he's like i want my damn money or whatever he lets him borrow because he can't handle being done that way. 1 sides hypocritical b.s. Its stuff like this the reason I have mental problems today. I can remember far back as a little kid him yelling as loud as can be and that mean constant look on his face. I always associated him with abobo from the nes game double dragon 2 with him because they looked so similar no kidding I'd play the game see him and go "dick" because that's my dads nickname from my great grandpa. This is just the tip of the iceberg of what ive gone through growing up living with him. Maybe I should make an account to keep track because I have much more to say just dont feel like writing anymore right now.
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