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2 weeks ago · · stress relief,
so, i had a best friend who has been in my life since seventh grade. i am in college now and we fell off for a while after she moved after our sophomore year in high school. i thought she was cool until we started high school. we had a small group of friends, it was me and lets call them mary, jane, and her who we'll call liz.
it was always fun being with them and hanging out with them and we never had a dull moment together. until mary and i met other people we wanted to be friends with. thats when things blew up.
liz was always getting mad at us for hanging out with those other people and even taking it to the extent of talking with those people and asking them why they wanted to be friends with us. she was basically telling them like "why are you hanging out with them, you guys dont even have anything in common." or "i think youre a bad influence on them and you shouldnt be hanging out with them. theyre my best friends." and the thing is, none of our new friends were like that. most of the time, we ignored it and even told her we wanted to hangout with them but again, shed get mad at us.
and one point, i went through a really bad time with family stuff and i became very depressed. mary and jane helped me through it but then i noticed liz was starting to say that she was depressed too and even made up a bunch of stories about her family which we later found to be lies. and that was when i started to notice that she wanted attention. it was further proved when she would get mad at us for not checking in on her everyday. it was like she wanted us to always ask if she was okay every hour of the day. at first, it was okay because you know, she was our friend, but then after a while it started to get a little tedious because she wouldnt answer some days so wed leave her alone thinking she just needed space but then, of course, she would get mad and say we never checked up on her.
when she moved, that behavior got a lot worse. and i was understanding because she was in a new environment trying to adjust and i would text her a lot and call her a lot but it just got ridiculous after a while. she would get mad at me for posting pictures and videos to my stories of me and the new friends i made. and she even called them "trash snake friends". when they were literally so nice to me and were like family to me. i also had a boyfriend who she became really friendly with and she would always tell me whenever she was talking to him and i was okay with it until they started talking discreetly and even met up to hangout a couple of times. she even went and asked him to help her do some illegal stuff that i will not say, he agreed to it but then later backed out of it and he told me everything. and after that, i had enough and i told her that. i stood my ground and then she says "im breaking up with you" and i was just like "okay bye".
then summer came around and i was just vibing until i had new student orientation at my university and we just happened to have the same nso date and she just so happened to be going to the same university as me. when she saw me, she cried and begged me to forgive her and apologized. and me being too nice, i forgave her and we were okay. then fall semester started and we were doing fine until she started talking about my boyfriend again and made up all these stories about him. saying that he got drunk when they met up and he would be all flirty and i already knew she was lying because my boyfriend never drank and he promised himself he wouldnt because alcohol is what tore his family apart and i knew him enough.
and that went on for about a month. and then i met a chill group of people that lived on the same floor as me in my dorm and we became very close right away. i introduced her to them because i knew she was having trouble making friends and i didnt want her to feel left out. i also let her stay in my dorm room because she lived off campus like almost 30 miles away and things were okay again. until she began to be very messy and unresponsible. she left my room a mess and i had a refigerator that i allowed her to leave her food in but she always left them in there to rot and i always had to clean up after her. so i told her that she needed to take care of that but she never listened and we ended up arguing about it which i had to apologize for and it really bothered me because she would talk about how she was raised to be a good guest in someone else's place.
but yeah, that went on for another month until i got tired of cleaning up her mess and only to find out that she was trying to get in contact with my boyfriend again and he told me about it and showed me her messages to him on insta and facebook. i confronted her and she lied to my face. i told her that i knew she was lying but she kept denying it. and thinking back, i think she may have wanted to get with him because she was always trying to get me to break up with him and trying to get his attention.
then i basically told her to leave me alone. i was stressed and she was already trying to sway my college friends to her side but they didnt listen to her and that just made her even more mad and she would talk crap about them and try to get me to stop hanging out with them. and these people were again a very good group of people, they hardly ever partied or drank and we would always enjoy nice evenings out together just grabbing a bite to eat or buying snacks and watching movies to even playing soccer together.
so eventually, i cut her off like back mid november. she of course was very mad, but i have honestly never felt better since. i dont feel as stressed or as guilty hanging with people i can actually vibe with. even my boyfriend agrees with me that it was for the best. but months later, she is still talking about me to our mutual friends from high school and i am very glad that none of them believe the things that she is saying about me. and i honestly just chuckle because i have never spoken bad about her the way she has about me since i cut her off. this was just a rant of built up emotions from this friendship i can now say was very toxic and i am glad to be free of it.
if you read this far, thank you. i appreciate you. i love you. and i hope you have an amazing day!