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I started dating this girl before the world went belly up and I really don’t know how to keep going with her. I think I like her and I want to keep our relationship but this semi long distance thing is getting tiresome. She can’t leave her house and the time we spend together is wasted at best. We can’t even get within 10 feet of eachother or her mother goes ballistic. (Some idiot is smoking outside my balcony and the smell makes me want to spray them with a firehose.) When she texts me she responds at best five minutes later and it infuriates me. When she calls me she’s playing some video game and can barely hold a conversation without going off on a tangent about something random. I’m breaking under the pressure of quarantine which caused me to lose two jobs and she keeps pretending that I’m fine. I want to talk to her without distraction. I want her to recognize that I’m not ok. Whenever I talk about how I’m not doing well she says that everyone isnt doing well and therefore i don’t matter. Is it really worth keeping her around? We were doing so well before quarantine but because I live in the grand old U S of A my braindead government is royally f*****g this up. I don’t want to go on a “break” with her because she’ll just leave me and I don’t want to ghost her or kill conversations because she’ll take that as an insult like she usually does. I really just want to talk to her less until things start easing up because this is going to turn into my first ex all over again, but I don’t know how to do that. How do I tell her that I need a bit of space?
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She sounds distracted, hard to focus, otherwise motivated, like you are not the center of attention. Does she take you for granted? Try email, snail mail to get through to her.
ReplyI can't tell you the right or wrong answer, in my opinion no one can, but anyway...
All I can say is if I were her in this situation, I'd want you to tell me the truth, tell me how you're feeling and ask that I understand that you need space.
In my opinion, communication, honesty, and respect are the most important things in any relationship, plus it's the only way you'll know for certain if someone truly cares or not. If you talk to them, tell them how you feel and ask that they understand and see things from your perspective and they, in turn, feel offended or angered at your feelings, then maybe that person is too selfish and immature for a relationship.
OR , they listen, and understand because they care for you and see your worth and values your relationship.
These ARE without a doubt completely insane times, and people are coping the best they can, but that doesn't excuse ignoring those who care about you.
Again this is just my opinion, hope it helps.
c:
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