describing who I am to clarify my mind

Don't look at the mistake english is not my native language but I still wanted to write like that cause I feel more comfortable)

Who am I?

Beside my body, ignoring my physical traits. Who is my soul? Do I have one?

Well i guess I have one, even if i sometimes ask myself when did it comes. My soul feel as a woman but a woman is more define with physicals characteristiques. So my soul is me.

If I had to describe me at a job interview, I would say that I am a joyful person who can work hard. I would say that i can adapt easily to new environment, that I can work with other people.

If I had to describe me infront of myself, then I would say that I am full of fear, that I'm always overthinking, even my thoughts can't get organized. I stay joyful because it's embarassing to show that your sometimes weak. I always try to be perfect but I'm always scared of the eyes that are on me. Sometimes I feel good, sometimes I feel on the edge, sometimes I am already falling. One year ago, when I was at my worst, I saw that the hole has no end, I realized that I was always falling, that it would never stop. And one day I accepted to live like that. Because, if there is no end, it will not hurt. The only pain will be the fear. And one day maybe everything will come to an end.

Hello, I am me. I am 15 years old. In 15 years I had the time to think of ending it at 13. Guess I am still here. Not ready but still here. There is beautiful things in life and I will experienced them all before I stop falling.