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I asked my family that I need to see a psychiatrist/psychologist because what I feel doesn't improve or change at all and it affects my daily function badly. They said theyd find some reliable until a year passed by they "HADNT" found one.
I brought it up again then they threatened me to send me off to an asylum if I insist further and told me that dont make this an excuse for my stupidity and irresponsibility and just be thankful instead as there are others who got worse situation than mine.
I managed to convince them to go already but whenever we finish a session and right after we come out from the clinic their faces change into stern as if they don't like what the doctor said and even told me that I chose to tell what it needs on purpose for me to get diagnosed with depression.
And that gave my sibling a chance to bully me even more. Always uses it against me during arguments especially when I proved a point; telling me that I'm crazy and insane. It's not uncommon to hear those from it when I told about its manipulation tactics and even forgot everything it had done to me yet it manages to remember every single detail about our mistakes like what I've written before.
They never change guys, I'm getting tired of these people whom I call "family". They'd just be a "family" whenever they need something from me, when I do what pleases them, or when I follow what they want.
I just really, really need to release this and I have no one to talk to. I've been crying secretly and having nightmares as I can't do anything about it. Peace and freedom are all I ask. I'm tired.
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Replyno it's not the solution. It affects all your family friends etc. I knew 2 people who died of suicide. Never knew why they did it. Anyway that's drastic the asylum part. That's not right how your parents act or your siblings bullying you. Depression doesn't mean insanity. They must be ignorant of mental health how it's classified. I've been told and called crazy too I have anxiety depression too. I'm more sane than those who called me that. Suicide is not the way out. I understand how you feel. Do you not have other family to take you in because clearly those people are toxic. Sorry your having nightmares too. I get them every so often I hate them. I hope you can find some peace you don't deserve to be treated like that.
ReplyHi there, I'm so sorry you have to deal with family like that. One hopeful thought comes to mind: you won't have to live with them much longer (relatively speaking). In other words, all you have to do is wait and at least the problem of their judgmental attitudes will go away because you'll be able to move out. Of course this doesn't help with your immediate problem, and trust me, I know how the immediate problem can be so painful that it's impossible to focus on next week, let alone a few years from now. But if you're thinking about suicide, then please try to remember that their attitudes won't be a problem once you are old enough to move out. I'm confident in you that you can deal with the rest (finding good mental health support) once you're free of your family's negative attitudes.
ReplyI wish i knew what to say. I’m so sorry. You don’t deserve that. You’re a person, beautiful and real and raw and perfect and you don’t deserve your pain. I love you, I wish i could do more for you
ReplyDon’t give up you should step up to family and say you’ve had enough the world may be dark right now but trust me the light will shine through.
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