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I sit there blankly staring at my screen, listening to music attempting to awake some kind of feeling in my heart. It's empty, yet weighs me down like an anchor. My mind drowning in the waves of an enraged sea tied to that anchor. Suffocation. Breathing and existence is impossible while being dragged to the bottom of an endless black pool.
It won't breathe, it can't see, denies the right to speak. Suffering alone without light to guide it. Have I been tossed into the waves of hate, or have I always floated in enragement? I drift alone, thinking alone, abandoned and discarded by many, I drift alone. My thoughts revolve around nothing. My vision blurs while I stare lifelessly into nothing. Darkness encircles what is around me. I refuse to open my eyes to the light, yet you still try, you know not what you try to do. Your efforts I hope are not in vain. I wish to smile and see the light with you, yet I'm sure you do not see it that way. I submit to that, rolling back over to feel the blade in my spine while I twist the handle. I do not wish to be in this situation, but to be free of these emotions. I want to be flying, I refuse to drown. I wish to be weightless as a feather not tethered to the baggage I so harshly carry.
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