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"UNCLEAR: When the third chakra is unclear, we feel powerless. Since we feel that we have no ability to gather what we need when we need it, we can be reduced to greed, doubt, anger, and then, of course, guilt. Our bodies respond to the constant tension by developing ulcers, jaundice, hepatitis, diabetes, hypoglycemia, and gallstones. Our sense of powerlessness in the world causes excessive worrying, hypochondriac pain, irritability, and procrastination. We are overly sensitive, cry easily, feel fatigue, and are often anxious and/or depressed.
Our inability to integrate the inner call of our Astral life with the outer world creates an over sensitivity to the psychic world of others. Other people"s fear, which is the "loudest" emotion to be felt in our third chakra, piggybacks onto our own fear. It then becomes increasingly difficult to be with others or in groups. Our mind races against us with obsessive thoughts and worries. Our negative emotions then amplify our negative thinking and keep us in a constant state of turmoil.
The power that we lost in our past must be regained so that we can live in the present. We must go back to find the negative core beliefs that we hold against ourselves. These beliefs constantly remind us that we are inadequate to face life"s challenges, and that we do not have the personal power to be happy and successful."
...........
I know a song about this feeling. It's Lisa Hannigan's, and called Teeth. I prefer the Daytrotter version of the song (as opposed to the album version). I think it conveys well the feeling of being overwhelmed by other people's emotions/fear/insecurity. Then wanting to go somewhere so far far away, from everyone. So that finally you can only feel yourself, and everything else is meaningless.
"Put me back into bottle, where the sea meets the sun, where bones and their rattle, they don't mean anything to noone. And I, I had a swing, where my salt was my own, I'd my teeth bared for battle till love lost, it made me dull."
Oh, I forgot to mention it also feels like a defeat. But only powerless people feel defeated, don't they? Meanwhile, I really wanna win; but this isn't my game, and everyone seems like losing. So, why all these craziness? I watched a documentary about Hannah Arendt, and she says/said we should all "stop and think!" All the hustle of daily life keeps people from stopping to think about what they are doing. Maybe that's why I am thinking/feeling so much. You know, because I didn't have much to do for so long. I am not lazy, but I've lost faith on life. And the world is crazy. How do you keep your eyes on the prize for so long, I don't understand? I soon have existential crises each and everytime I try. I'm not even rich or comfortable. God knows I have less than enough. And, moan a lot, but I think of stopping. I am telling my myself "Accept the consequences of your decisions!" And my answer to myself is "But my life feels so wrong! Everyone else that vaguely resembles me have much much better life with quite a priviledged backgroung." What would your response be to that?
I won't be bothered anymore. I know I'm an oddity, and I decided to accept myself and my life as it is. I have no idea how I'm going to get out of this rut; but I try to be hopeful. I don't see any way out, and that deeply saddens me... but I don't know...
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