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My mother is emotionally oppressive with me. She’s always been like this. I like to think that the cause is my father being completely out of our lives while still living in the same house or maybe she thought that with having me she could have saved her marriage with whatever my father is. As I try to tidy up every emotion I have inside, all the traumas I have experienced in other to move on with my life, there’s still the problem of me still living with my parents (in my country it’s actually normal to live with your parents until you graduate college or even later) and every day is becoming a challenge for me. I can’t move out now because i should go all across the country to do it or even abroad and there’s a pandemic going on and also I need to graduate first and I can’t provide for myself now. I tried to talk to her, in a calm way, in a angry way, in every way I could. Now she’s having this obsession of saying all the time “oh how will I live without you” “ah how will you do all these things without me?” “My life will be over” of course not respecting my choice of not wanting to hear that because is actually very manipulative because she makes me feel guilty. and she gets angry because she wants like physical touch and to kiss me and stuff and I’m uncomfortable with it, sometimes she tries so hard that it makes me scream. I tell her all the time that forced physical touch makes me anxious no matter where it comes from but she answers that is wrong to act like that with her that is my mother who only wants to love me. Also this last week or so she’s starting to comment every move I make to make jokes or fun of me but I just feel like she follows everything I do and everywhere I go. Then she denies all the traumas I’ve had to go through when I was a kid (like having to be her therapist since I can remember because she had “no one else to talk to”) problems with my brother, my father ecc... so yeah I try to be happy and do my things in other to move out and live the life I deserve to live but sometimes it’s hard to go on with your day in this situation and not being able to talk to anyone about it.
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I can highly relate. My dad is the same way. A complete ass and a jerk. Denies any and all wrong doing to me as well and will not apologize. Has mocked me many times accusing me of living in a fairy world. Well even if I am it's better than spewing misery hate and being sour all the time like him. At times he watches every move I make so he can criticize me too. Mine also used to guilt trip me as well . It's not easy having a parent like that.
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