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Why is it that today I thought of you. The shame I felt when I passed through this old street that you once lived. The place where many memories flooded in and with its unstoppable force I was pressured to rethink my decisions. It's pathetic to even consider what could have been if I did stand my ground and told your father that I truly love you, what would my life be? I never stop having those thoughts even when I avoid your street because this is a regret I live with, but such cowardness of mine led you to sleep with another and hindered you pregnant. Do you even think of me then? Now that I have learned to accept this fate, I look back and remember that smile. The joyous smile I always provoked and the promises that you and I only know. I just wish to apologize and make amends because this is the only loose end that needs to be cut. Once I finish my degree that you hate so much can I even see what life you have made for yourself with him? Not to judge but to thank him that he was able to take you in and make you his wife. I want to see that smile even if I'm not the one providing it anymore because only then I would know that you are loved by a true man. JP.
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