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Today is already a sad day. It is my grandpa's birthday and I have been struggling with his death for years. He meant the world to me and his wife just died in January. I think I just need a vacation and run from everything. On top of all that my ex keeps playing with my feelings, I think things are going well as to be just friends but then he acts like we are still together it is confusing. He is confusing me every day when he talks to me. And my brother and sister-in-law don't take very good care of their three kids and everyone relies on me to fix the problem, to do what they want me to do including my parents. The only one that didn't do all that was my grandmother that passed in January. I have thought about suicide a few times and I know I shouldn't but it feels like I don't belong in this world anymore. I just want to feel wanted and to be around for the right reasons. I want to be happy which I haven't been in a very long time.
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Hey, so i can relate with you on this one sorta. I lost both my mom and dad in september 2018, and my oldest sister took care of me. It came to a point of living with her that her and her husband became unstable to where i was always watching their kids, and i felt the same way you do. Those kids aren't yours, nor are they your responsibility. Also, i know your grandparents are having a jolly time up there in the clouds, singing happy birthday at the top of their lungs. Whenever you said goodbye to him, you didn't say goodbye forever, just goodbye for now. We will see them again, hug them again, i promise we'll cherish them again. Stay Strong, if you need something im right here. <333
ReplyThank you so much I needed to hear that.
ReplyIt sounds like you are very generous with your loved ones; try to balance this with a focus on some short-term goals of your own. Stay strong - strengthen your faith in what you cannot see - faith is a journey not a light switch, and the road will get bumpy at times.
Courtesy notice: the following includes a reference to a book that contains writings over 2000 years old which are mostly parables about human nature, both vile human nature as well as moral human nature, parables that are meant to teach us to learn and grow. No religion required, and better yet: no public displays of devotion required. Some bullies will label this "trolling", so "change the channel" now if of no interest to you.
1 Thessalonians 5:11
Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.
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