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I am a 17 year old girl.
I'm currently feeling very tired of life. I don't really know why but I just do. Maybe it's because exams are coming up and I have a lot to study and memorise and keep in my mind and I just feel overwhelmed. My personality also includes that I want to be perfect so it could also be a reason.
I am also in a relationship right now which I don't feel is working out the way I expected. We've been together for six months now.
Since March (now is May) I feel that we've been lacking on the communication part, which is what I feel is the most important thing in a relationship. I have voiced my opinion on this to him more than once but not too much as repeatability is not that effective, I believe. I don't know what to do because the situation did not really improve the way I was hoping it to. I am also kind of upset regarding the amount of times we meet. To me it was fine when we were meeting up once a week and still texting during the week, but now it seems like everything declined; we barely text and we're not really meeting up... Again, most probably because of exams but other times for example he did not want to meet up because he "wasn't up for it" or he had "other things to do". I feel like I deserve a greater priority in his life if he actually wants me as his girlfriend. Okay, again, right now exams are both of our priorities but come on, not even a how are you or 'how are you doing' everyday? I would expect at least 5 mins out of his life to check on me, it won't mess with his studies nor mine. Tbh I kind of gave up on texting first so this week I haven't really texted either. But that just proves that he also did not. I don't know, I'm really confused on what to do as this is my first like "real" relationship. I just want to feel loved and get the attention I deserve...
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I hate this thing called life
I hate myself for being not enough.. i hate everything i do .. i hate that all i do is to complain.. i dont know myself anymore.. everything is out of control !...
I am not saying that he doesn't love me, because he still does. He cares and wants positive things for me in life... for example he congratulates me when I do well on tests. However I believe we are still lacking in some part of the relationship and although I do not wish to break up, if this continues going on I don't know if I can handle it anymore. I want to be hopeful and wait until summer holidays start, but I don't know... I'm confused.
Replywell .. i understand your worry.. he could be going through something and not voicing it out .. but for now, focus on your studies.. do your best to do so.. prioritize.. and time will give you the answer.. have patience.. and leave things be .. sometimes when we are stressed we tend to shift our focus to another problem as a distraction ... i used to do that .. i should be focusing on one real issue or a high priority but my mind wanders to another "problem" that i have no control over just to distract me from what i actually have control over.. in your case you have control over your studies ( to study or not) but you have no control over whether he will reply or not or what he is thinking of..
have patience everything will be revealed later..
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