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Several years ago, I had a friend who was very jealous of me, which is understandable and okay but it just manifested in ways that ended up hurting me. She was beautiful, but she didn't see that in herself. She only saw that I was very beautiful and she wanted to be like me. Instead of being a friend to me, her jealousy of the male attention I got kind of took over and she started to throw slight jabs at me here and there like "why aren't you there for him" (when my ex was being abusive to me). It made it hard for me to stand up to my ex who was emotionally and verbally abusive. I had a lot of friends, and she was deeply insecure that my phone was blowing up with texts from my friends and hers was silent. I completely understand and empathize with her because not having a lot of texts/messages can seem isolating and I always tried to be there for her. It was also kind of frustrating because, hello, I'm here for you. Yet, you don't notice that. You only want to be friends with other people who are texting me or you want the attention that I get. Anyways, I started to go through some difficult times in my life when my ex and I were going through rough times. At around the same time, she started hanging out with my ex and his friends and intentionally not inviting me. She wouldn't spend time with me anymore because she had made friends with some of them and she no longer needed me as an "in". Any frustration or anger I showed only made me look bad, so I just learned to find my own way. I thought it was really wrong that she acted like this, as she was supposed to be my friend. But instead of being my friend, she took my ex's side during a break up which caused my heart to break twice all at the same time. She then unfollowed me on social media, another covert attack. She never texted me or called to see if I was okay, and meanwhile she would be at parties with my ex and his friends, concerts that we wanted to go to together, etc. She also would throw parties herself and intentionally leave me out. This was all during a time when I was going through my first breakup. I don't know....was I wrong in any of this? Should I expect more? I know I should move on, but I also feel like I haven't talked about this so I haven't gotten a lot of support because I just bottled it all up. Thanks for reading this
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I know exactly how you feel. I had a situation like that. It hurts when people hate on you over something you can't control. I know that hurts so much honey, and I'm sorry you're going through this. But just let her go. She was never your friend, she just wanted to be you. What you are. What you had.
But even though it seems she's taken over your life, in truth, she's still not you. She never will be. And sooner or later your friends will see that, but it will be too late.
Just keep being you. Make some new friends. Make a new life without the toxicity. Be happy. Enjoy yourself without them. You're not wrong. But please don't let this ruin you. You're better than that. And that's something she never will be.❤ Big hugz
ReplyHey your kindness goes such a long way. Thank you for helping me feel less alone in all this and giving me such wonderful advice. I am working on validating my feelings and loving myself wholly :)
ReplyYou are so very more than welcome!💜 Go forth and be your fabulous self! 😊
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