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I haven't used Novni for a few months because my problems haven't been as big. I don't know. I'm to the point where I want to say "fuck it" and leave everyone's life and be on my own in life but at the same time, I don't. lately, I have been having dreams of my future self. my dreams are very weird and graphic. When I graduate from high school I want to attend NYU. I'm going to be living in new york of course. In my dream, I'm in my apartment in new york. I'm crying with liquor bottles all around me. Sometimes my dreams end with me in my bathroom on the floor bleeding out. Other times it ends when I jump off a building and hit the floor, in all honesty, its making me concerned and scared for my future. Suicide has always been a problem for me ever since I was in the 3rd grade. I don't know if I should be worried or not. This is all just a bit concerning.
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Yikes, those dreams sound awful. I used to have scary visions like that, such bad ones. I hope you never turn to alcohol. You have control over that. No one can force that on you. I did turn to it, and I kept ending up in the hospital, the psych hospital that is. Anyway, for years I wanted to end my life. I made plans all the time, but I kept putting them off another day, fortunately. When I turned my life to God, the thoughts went away, yay! I'll remember you in my prayers. Sending you a big hug! 🤗
Replythank you very much i really appreciate it ill keep you in my prayers as well
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