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Almost 7 years. It's been 7 years since I have seen you or talked to you. I loved everything about you. But if you were to ask me what, I can't really tell. I just love you for who you are. You seem to be the perfect person for me. Or that's what I have been telling to myself after years of fantasizing about you. I day dream about you, I dream about you, I think about how your life is, if you're smiling or not. I hate to write this in an anonymous website and not to you. I stalked almost every account of yours. You put in a lot of info about yourself so can't tell anything about that hehe. I know where you are, how your family has been, what you do. But. It's wrong. It feels wrong and unfortunate to know so much info about you but nothing about YOU as a person. There is absolutely nothing I can do with that information. Nothing. I can't approach out of the blue. But I can't force things out and make you approach me. Before I even seemingly go into the wrong path, please let me move on. I wanna live my life, date others, work hard and enjoy every sad and happy memory. Please leave from my mind. I don't want you to linger in my thoughts or my dreams. I am getting tired of it. I have said that quite a few times in my life but I feel like now is high time. I have a life too. Just so y'all know, I am really not telling that person to go, because they are already out of my life physically. But mentally, I am still stuck with them. So I need them to go away from my life in every possible way. And only I can do it. But thank you. For giving me a good memory to hold on. Thank you for making my life in those days a little better. It was something. My love and support for you will always be there. But things are different now. I have other people in my life who stuck with me through the thick and thin. I have my career and work waiting for me. Now, I shall bid you goodbye love.
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What happened to make you feel like you need anyone this bad? You are a human being, do you realize that this makes you valuable and powerful enough in your own right, that you shouldn't need to go that deep on a fantasy? Because if you can't approach them then that's what it is. It's not a crush, it's not a connection, it's usually not even real love no matter what it feels like. It's just empty, meaningless ideas in your head that for some reason you've decided to glorify. Now most of the time this is because of extreme loneliness or some other unbearable pain or humiliation in your day to day life. But if that's the case then that's what's "causing" the infatuation. Not actually regular emotions, but an emotional problem caused by how life is. Well those problems have solutions. Sometimes hard to find solutions. But they are out there.
ReplyJust when I thought 7 months is too long for me to still not moved on :O
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