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You couldn't stand not being near me, not talking to me. You walked through the freezing winter for me. You told me I could always count on you to be there for me. You made me feel loved like I've never been loved before and truly cared about. Your presence alone was euphoric. We showed each other our "weird" side. Living in a fantasy of secret affection.
As time passed and I needed you, you got angry. You yelled at me, told me I wasn't doing the right thing. My depression was at its highest, my self-esteem low. I asked for hugs, for touch. All I got was criticized. You made me so used to you being there for me that I forgot how to handle my emotions on my own. You acted as if I was the one against you, you told me you were trying to help when in reality you were holding me down. You seemed to be there for everyone else but me. I told you I was there for you but you hardly came to me. From time to time you were nice, but as soon as I asked about something or when we would be ale to hangout together you got angry. I do not understand why you would start this if you did not have time for me.
Our attraction towards each other is apparent and I have always been loyal to you. I give up having friends just to have you. I can not bare to see or think about you hugging, touching, kissing someone else. Doing our weird things with someone else. You're not here for me, not like you used to be, Yet I cant help but to still love you. because we can not seem to understand each other, we are toxic. Though I love the chaos sometimes, I know I have to let you go. For the both of us.
Your love is a drug and I am an addict.
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Probably this is a mutual thing. if I may be so bold, I think, after a toxic relationship you need time time heal. Please take your time, you're worth it!
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