My Unsent Letter

Do you know that it really hurts? Do you want to know the truth about what I'm feeling? I feel rotten :) I've been crying a lot, doubting myself, and going in between sleeping a lot for two days, then not being able to sleep at all the entire night. I thought about multiple ways to die, because on top of all the bs and turmoil that's happening in my life the past week, suddenly, you tell me, "it's not the same, something's not right."

I want to understand why, but hey, what can I do? I mean, the high is gone---what's left now? I guess I'm not good enough when times are rough?

Now you're quiet and I'm waiting, waiting, waiting.

Just like how you promised me you won't do this to me ever. That you were different from other men. And yes, you defied the stats from previous relationships, and we were happy. Up until that time we fought, just a couple of days ago, we were very happy.

Of course, things become different from time to time. It doesn't mean that we don't love each other anymore.

I care for you so so so so much. This wasn't a game to me. You said this was for the long run. That you were here to stay. I'm willing to go the extra mile for you.

What's on your mind? Why did you not elaborate? Why did you choose to keep quiet again?

My heart hurts so much. It doesn't help that you choose to do this when my depression has already started creeping in for a couple of weeks now. This is too much.

Please, don't leave me. I've always been abandoned and I've never had such 8 most wonderful months as much as I did with you.