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TW:
Eating disorder - Relapse - Restricting
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So... EDs are a sensitive subject but for the last week I've been having so many ups and downs that I can barley think straight. Scholl started and it's been a bit rough adjustment. I find myself either restricting or eating what I feel like is too much. My sleep schedule is a mess which also leads to more eating problems.
Then comes the self-hatred and the thoughts of relapse. When that happens I find myself feeling lost between falling back into my old habits or pushing through and trying to get better. I spiral between the good feeling of starvation and the want to be better. To look at food as food not numbers.
It's hard to think with a million thoughts running around inside, but I hope that I'll wake up feeling better.
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Hang in there hun, try to stay busy with things (studies or hobbies) so you don't get too obsessed over food. I know it's hard, I've had an ED for years, up and down. We just gotta think straight and make it thru this <3
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