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So on top of the other b.s. today I had mom being a hateful whatever to me. If it wasn't fighting with her Today it was me being dive bombed by a cicada and yellow jacket trying to get me not wanting to leave me alone outdoors. Mom acts angry and pissed off at me she gave the hatefulest tone earlier. I asked what she was mad about but she denied it. It felt like the universe was against me today. Dad like me doesn't normally write private thoughts on paper only when he's got a changed attitude under influence of drugs as he's been the last 4 days at least. He doesn't use internet but he don't normally write an entire page either. It feels like anger bitterness and negativity in this house. I can't sleep because dad or somebody or something is constantly waking me uplike dad has the last 2 to 3 days in his drunk at 2, 3 , 4 am. Mom unbelievably defended him today saying he wasn't loud etc this morning. How would she know she was asleep I heard him get up spouting stuff in a sour angry voice to himself. But of course I'm wrong as always. He stressed me out so much this morning I thought I was gonna have a heart attack my left arm never hurt so bad before. Universe give me a break please. Why all the hatred for somebody who don't do nothing to nobody unless really pissed off. My own parents act like they wanna disown me. It's the drugs changing their personalities it always does. Give me a break i desperately need rest and peace. Sighhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
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