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I think I’ve given up
I don’t think I want to die, no
But living seems pointless
The days pass by me
Weeks filled with slumber
I don’t want to be awake, no
Escape I’d rather
My passion is dying
And there’s no reviving
I don’t know what I’ll do
For now, breathing will do
It’s funny
Living was beautiful at one point
Now I’m all alone
Accompanied with loneliness and despair
Where are my friends?
Where are my loved ones?
Do I even have any?
I can’t think of anyone anymore
I tried to think about the last time I was happy
It was almost 2 years ago
I wish I could feel again
I miss my father terribly
But the only memories I can remember is of him hitting me
I miss my mother terribly
But the only memories I can remember is of her yelling at me
I miss my siblings terribly
But I’ve been away for so long
I think they resent me
I wasn’t there for them after all
I don’t know
I’m confused
I’m lost
Is there anyone listening?
Help
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Your truth and your memories are your own. Find solace somewhere, find love and passion in something inside yourself. You can try music. Your words would sound really powerful in a song (Staind like…). I found that writing and creating shelter for yourself in words, poems, novels, is a good way to have a place from where you can move forth and back into the outside world. And return whenever you feel the need…
ReplyThanks themuse. I’ve never even heard of Staind ahaha. Gonna check them out! Music was one of the stuff that made life easier back then, but idk nothing just makes me feel these days. Thanks again for your words, I think I’ll write more frequently. Grateful that I found this site
ReplyGet up early tomorrow and go to see the sunrise. Then don't meet anyone. Take a break for one day. Eat all your favourite food. Watch your favourite childhood cartoon show. Go to see the sunset too. Then exercise and go to sleep.
ReplyI’m riding a train tomorrow to go pick up my meds. Hopefully I’ll get to see the sun rise since I’m leaving early. Do you have any feel good songs for me to listen to?
ReplyIf you are religious "You Raise Me Up ,Song by Josh Groban"
Or just listen to some sweet instrumental melody. They give so much mental peace.
Also don't think too much. Even if We are alone we are still enough. We don't need to be with toxic people just to feel happy.
ReplyI can relate to this wow. I hope things get better for you. At the moment I’m just keeping busy to keep myself from thinking or hurting myself. Maybe try that. I would suggest doing something you love/enjoy. I personally don’t enjoy anything so not really an option for me but try that. Goodluck !!!
ReplyHeya, thanks for your comment! I just graduated from my degree, so I don’t really have anything to keep me busy nowadays 😂 But I did find a new band (?) Well they’re not new but I just recently found them. It’s half alive. Their music makes me feel warm :)
ReplyHappy for you ! Keep finding reasons to live each day. :)
Reply