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I'm trying to be humble, but I think I'm actually just putting myself down
2 years ago · 5 · Stress, +6
562
Sometimes trying not to be over confident in myself and my abilities turns in to just not being confident at all. Does this happen to anyone else?
For example, with music/singing I'll tell myself over and over that I'm not the best singer and that I should be prepared to get criticized because I'm not perfect. Then I'll start thinking about how I need to remember that people are always going to be better than me and going over all my flaws.
My whole life I've taken this as remembering to be humble, but I think it's getting to the point where I'm just beating myself up and fixating on everything I do wrong. Instead of focusing on the fact that I'm not perfect, and that really nobody is, I'm focusing on just how far from perfect I am and reminding myself that other people are always better than me.
Does anyone else think like this? Is it okay/healthy? If not, is there any way I can stop thinking this way so much?
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Saaaaame. I do that too. It's not healthy tho. I guess in order to stop, you need to just aquire more confidence in general. Like in every aspect. If you're good at singing, then you're good at singing. It's not humbling to tell yourself that you're not. Give yourself credit for what you can do. Being humble is more about being able to acknowledge other people's talents and less about your flaws, so don't dwell on them. As soon as you start doing that, replace that thought with something good. You could be the most confident, best singer in the entire world (and know it) and still be humble just as long as you don't put yourself on a pedestal.
Example: "I'm a good singer." Vs "I'm a good singer and everyone else sucks."
Confidence does not equal arrogance
Does any of that make sense??
ReplyThat does, thank you! I just wanted to make sure I'm moving in the right direction. I'll work on calling myself out when I start saying stuff like that to myself.
ReplyYes, that's what always to me too. But you know, choosing to be humble is never really easy since from the start. It means you have to constantly remind yourself to not feel too much, and not too little at all times. It's part of the struggle, but it's worth it. In my experience, we can't really can't avoid at all. In most cases, we'll messed up. However, as time goes by, we learn how to slowly but surely control ourselves.
It's part of the disciplining process. As you've said nobody is perfect. But know this, as what people commonly says, "Life is full of ups and downs". I thought I was the only one feeling the same thing, , but then, I learned that everybody does. It's just different from another person's perspective.
It's either you choose to be or suffer the consequences. And I think you really did a good job. So cheer up! I'm also like that. You don't need to worry too much. If you really want it that badly, you won't ever let anyone even your own mind, to stop you from achieving it.
You can do this! We can do this! You're not alone! HAVE A GREAT DAYYYYY~
Reply*that's what always HAPPENS
ReplyI feel this so much.
There's a time to be humble for sure, but there's balance. The balance between being humble and confident. You need to make sure you shine your light and not dim it for others. This is something I'm still learning to do. If they can't handle the glare, maybe its not meant for them to look.
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