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I was born female and I love being feminine, but I can't help but find myself almost feeling a certain kind of dysphoria every now and then... I don't want to be a man, I just wish I had male parts.
My parts suck.
I've never had an orgasm. I even bought a toy because I thought it would help. It didn't, or at least it hasn't. I wish I could do it how guys do. It seems to happen so easily for them. multiple times a week? I can't even imagine having that kind of drive... I wish I could service myself in that way.
I want to pee standing up. It's silly but I absolutely envy the ability. The amount of times I've held it until it hurt because I didn't want to deal with the hassle or embarrassment of pulling over on a car trip are far too many. Men going wherever and whenever they need to just seems to be the norm. Lucky bastards.
My parts don't help me in any way. They actually inconvenience me in several.
Maybe I'm just mad about how much men have that I don't. I guess that's what this boils down to, in its essence.
I'm young. I have so much, well, basically everything, left to experience and try. Perhaps I'll outgrow this in a matter of time... or maybe not. I can't remember a time I've ever not felt like this to some extent.
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I feel it. Honestly I think my life would be easier if I was a guy. If be paid more I could be a slob and it wouldn't look as bad. I could get women a lot easier. I just think things would be easier.
ReplyOP returning (with my period!) to say that iām even more grouchy about it now
ReplyI'd almost convinced myself to transition for these exact reasons. Not in a way that I'm just saying that, I was so angry about being a woman and weirded out by my body that I seriously wanted to do it. I dressed, talked and acted like a man even though my true core loves being feminine. I just hate the way we are treated and got tired of the bull shit so I ditched my gender identity for a decade. I am glad to be back.
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