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this overwhelming feeling of grief has been with me for weeks. every night, i lay down on the cold bathroom floor, desperately trying to come to a conclusion of my thoughts before going to bed, teary eyed. every night, i message anonymous strangers in hope to find somebody who's willing enough to listen to me and be my friend. every night, i miss what i've had with that one person, i miss those times when i was innocent, happy and free of my problems. i miss the feeling of non-obligation when getting into a relationship, i miss me before having sex with someone older, i miss the old me. i've promised myself that i'll never lose myself again, but it's getting hard. i cannot let myself go like that, but yet again, my grip is getting weaker.
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