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This happens when I ask my parents to award me money since I achieved being a high honor student. My brother also asks them for passing his first semester in college. They agreed.
We went to the city and bought things as well as food for our house appliances and for the upcoming wedding celebration that were going to attend to. I went to the city to buy my books for academic purposes. My brother went to buy clothes.
As we entered the mall, my mother did not accompany us and stayed. Instead, she orders my older brother to buy food on our way. We did bought it. However, my brother asks me to lend him money for his clothes in the wedding, I let him. He then asks me another money for the foods he's going to buy, I let him. Then my sister asks me to buy an expensive drink, I let her. I did it since they said my mother would pay me afterwards.
And when we return home to collect the debts, they won't give me any money.
Overall, I felt really bad. My brother who almost failed his semester was able to use all the money, while me who did a great job in my studies despite the online learning was not able to buy anything for myself.
I already knew whom my parents would side on. My mother laughed at me. My brother now call me names. My father would just let them be. My sister just plays games. No one really understood me.
The scariest thing that I realized that all the hard work that I put into studying was seen as nothing.
I now talked rarely to them. My father tries to woo me. My brother continues calling me names.
I just don't want anything related to them. But I really felt guilty for my father, he tries to strike conversations with me but I would only response for like 5 words, and would only nod for close-ended questions.
He even would make long conversations but I would just stayed silent & continues my work, but I really felt him doing his best but no matter what, I can't forget all the things they've done to me in the past.
Even if I loathe my brother and mother, my dad was also one of the person who tries to break my heart and make me cry inside my room without making any noise. I even heard them arguing to apologize to me for the reason that I'm just intelligent, and maybe in their minds that someday I will become successful and help them.
It HURTS. When I look at others with close bonds with their family my heart throbs, I even cried in public remembering those painful times. It's a good thing that I wore a mask and have bangs.
I have no plans in opening-up with my family ever again. Do you also think so?
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It's your decision if you do not want to open up to your family. But, it will continue to hurt you for a long time. You must at try and make them understand your feelings at least once. If the relationship between you all has already deteriorated so much you have got nothing to lose.
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