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My grandparents don't even try to know me even though they always have time for my younger cousins
2 years ago · 0 · Family, +2
256
At 15, I'm the oldest of eight grandchildren on my mother's dad's side of the family. My grandfather divorced my grandma Laura (my mother's mom) and married another woman, my grandma Ellie.
My grandfather and Ellie live thirty minutes from us, but I see them four times a year. The younger cousins (my mom's half brother's kids) see them multiple times a week.
Me, my brother, and my cousin Amy have noticed that we're often left out or ignored. I swear, they talk to me a maximum of twenty minutes total every time I see them, and they only really spend one on one time with my brother or Amy every once in a while (normally, they come by for birthdays every few years. They're planning to stop in for Amy's this week. They haven't spent one on one time with me since I was eight or nine).
They seem to like Amy, occasionally, they'll show up at a school event or something. They at least know her favorite color. My grandfather and my brother talk about wood working. But I feel like they really don't care about me. They only know I do theater because my mom asked them to come to one production five years ago (we've asked them to come to others, they've sited church functions or needing to attend every one of my younger cousin's soccer games instead).
They don't know that I love music, and literally anyone who listens to me for five minutes can figure that out. They don't know any of my friends, what school I go to, what my interests are.
And that would be understandable if they lived far away, but no. It's just like they don't actually care enough to find out the bare minimum.
I don't understand. What is it about me in particular? I'm a good kid. I am super active in my community, I work hard in theater and music, I have good manners, I scored in the 99th percentile on the PSAT this year. I put in work to improve and achieve and I do it while trying to be nice to everyone I meet.
I know I'm not perfect, but am I also not good enough?
I don't want drugstore cards, I don't want checks or pretty clothes. I don't want promises of "we'll come next time" because they won't. I just want to spend quality time with them. I want my brother and Amy to be able to spend time with them.
It's just unfair and confusing. I don't want to sound ungrateful, but this really upsets me. I'd never, ever blame my younger cousins, but my grandparents seem to favor them.
Why?
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