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If you are in crisis and need immediate help, please call 1-800-273-8255 (NSPL) or text HOME to 741741 (Crisis Text Line). More resources.
im just really struggling here. im tired of pretending to be okay. IM NOT OKAY. there, i said it. someone please save me. I've had so many suicidal/sh thoughts lately and it scares me how intrusive they've gotten
i know this doesnt have much details but heres one detail bc if i did them all id have an entire book instead of a post:
my friend attempted suicide a couple weeks ago (they OD'd on aspirin, they texted me that night and I had to alert their parents who called an ambulance etc)- keep in mind that we are both 16 :/
so yeah that was a rough night (and week tbh) anyways they went to a psych ward for about a week after that, i got to see them like last week so that was good but they told me they're going back to another residential mental hospital 10 hrs away for anywhere between 10-12 months. this put a huge pain in my heart because this is my best friend and i barely survived a week without them, but an entire year? I want what is best for them though, so if this will help them then that is the most important thing right now. I'm trying my best, i promise. I just really miss them.
This isn't the first time something like this has happened to me either, something similar happened to my other best friend who now goes to another school but i still see them around. What am I doing wrong. I feel like im losing all my friends and i am constantly looking for red flags and its exhausting. I know its not my job but if anything happened to anyone id feel guilty so this is the least i can do.
idk. help me.
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There is no need to feel guilty about anything happening to your friends. You must be depressed to have suicidal thoughts so please go to a doctor for help. You may need to be referred to a therapist or psychiatrist. Ask God for help as well.
Replythank you, i appreciate it and god bless you. I have a therapist but im too scared to talk to her about it.
Reply