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today was horrible. i want to die. i had an argument with a conservative friend about trans rights and now i feel sick bc she cried and i cried and she legitimately thinks i'm a bad person now. we made up at the end but i am so insecure that i never actually believe people are telling me the truth when they say they're okay. and i try really hard to be fair to people but it's hard to like her when she clearly only looks at things from one side. and it's also obvious that she doesn't know any trans people irl and sometimes i just get so angry i can't breathe.
i'm shaky. i have anxiety and this week has already been terrible bc i've worked so many hours.
now i'm afraid that she's going to tell her parents or mine what i said and i feel like a hypocrite bc my parents probably think i agree with them about conservative issues and i don't. i'm a lesbian and i'm terrified to come out bc i'm afraid that they won't love me anymore and i know they'll yell at me and my anxiety can't take that anymore i want to kill myself.
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If your parents are real parents they would love you what so ever. They might be bad and do stupid things and many emotional and many wrong decisions as any of us. THey're also people as us with their own problems and their own struggles. But if they do deserve your love they'll love you what so ever.
Iam not supporter nor against LGBT. I divide people on good and bad. I believe that you're good, and as long as you are good person we support you and are with you.
I believe that what you need is to talk to people whether your friends or anyone who is willing to listen and try to understand, possibly offer support.
Does not matter what people thinks about you, you can get away from them. What really matters is what you think about yourself. You can not run from yourself.
All good wishes, from my heart
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