To my almost

It’s been a month now and I think I am finally able to talk about it. I loved you. I did. I fell in love with you

And I think you knew but idk and it’s okay. Maybe when I tried to fix things you found it clingy or maybe annoyed that’s also okay. I am annoying sometimes. I just don’t give up on people especially the people I love. I just didn’t wanna regret later that I didn’t try. I don’t wanna think like ‘ oh maybe I could have tried to talk him out of this or I didn’t do shit to save what we had. I am sorry I was harsh on you you didn’t deserve that. But maybe now I said I loved you you’ll understand why I did cause I was all the time hurt. But it’s also not your fault. You have your boundaries and limits and I tried to step in it. I am sorry for that. I should have respected your boundaries. But when I thought okay imma let you go now then I heard you’re leaving and I didn’t know about it. I thought it was horrible and I thought maybe I was so horrible that he didn’t even think of telling me. I cried cried for days but I thought if it doesn’t matter to you then i should do the same and the last day you left with a box and Thankyou for everything statement. I didn’t deserve to be treated like that chi. I am worth more than that but also I thought we weren’t friends anymore we were just colleagues. I am trying to move on hopefully one day when someone says your name my heart wouldn’t break cause you aren’t there anymore. I just want to tell you that if forever was mine, I’d have wait for you.

Well, couldn’t say a proper goodbye but here it is: Thankyou for the times when no one listened to me you took me to drives and made me feel better, Thankyou for bringing or taking me to drivethru for food when I was hungry, thankyou for giving me hugs when I needed it, Thankyou for holding my hands when I was scared, Thankyou for giving me your jacket when I was cold, Thankyou for the ice cream, thankyou for saving me from **** and **** when I did wrong,, idk how many things I need to say cause idk if it’s enough. Thankyou for everything. You were my best friend and you made my life better just by being on it. I hope you’re doing well.I hope you’re happy. Keep smiling looks good on you. Thankyou for being there and breaking my heart as well.I had to tell you this cause this is me letting you go now. Take care