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After getting what I want I'm gonna throw a big party and I won't include just the two of you why coz why not, you weren't there for me in my bad times n when I needed you so what's the point of you being in my happy moments I asked for help from both you, you know I needed you but still you ignored and the rest people I asked for help from them too they didn't ignored me did the bare minimum as much as they were capable off but you two simply ignored even though I was vocal about it but you didn't helped right so when you guys realize I was never the problem n talk about this just remember I asked for help n you didn't helped me so me cutting you two off is a legit reason... have a life without me be happy just don't expect me to be a part of it.... I've moved on from two of you n I did my very best to save that relationship and friendship n you guys just left and even though you care but just so yk you guys were very big reasons what happened idc if you come back one day n say take me back I'm not going too you guys have done enough n I seriously can't stand you guys anymore tbh I'm a good person you guys if come n talk to me ill talk to you but don't expect me to give the same position in my life you had before.... you don't leave and runaway from the situation when it isn't working I'm glad you stop loving me sooner coz if it would happen some years later it would've been worse.... I feel betrayed and cheated by you guys I heard plenty of things becoz of you that I need validation and I'm obsessing over you and you don't even care.... my family is being a part of this shitty thing n I hate this more than any fucking thing in this world so leave my boring ass n move on with your lives... thank you very much for the good times I had with you guys and I respect your decision even though it was heartbreaking to me let's be sensible nobody's there for anyone... idk about the future but I hope you guys do good with your lives n don't worry about me I'm gonna achieve everything I dreamed off with or without you... I'll move on n just remember the good things we had all along and lessons I learned after you guys left.... I've tormented my self respect enough people say you wanted to explore things n you kinda used me idk what were your intentions you used me or not but as much as I think about those two moments the one where we were hanging around the park and the one where you were looking straight into my eyes n I felt that's how real love is I felt beautiful all along I still think about it n until I create memories with someone new I'm gonna think about think it I won't regret leaving you two coz if my absence was never a problem then my presence never even mattered I've been stupid and bad all along sorry for all the bad things I did to you knowingly and unknowingly live a good and healthy life ahead..... forget what people say I don't feel like you used me I could be wrong maybe you did idk as much as I felt and I've been with you all those late nights and the way you hold me n correct my clothes when no one is looking I felt it was real love n it was real to me.... even though you say it was fake it didn't seem fake to me just for those moments you cared.... I felt it with my heart maybe I could be wrong but feelings can't be wrong right I don't know you gave up on our relationship and I felt like walking out was the best thing I could do I don't regret sending you the last text which really translates to I'm done with you and myself and I can't lower my self respect anymore than that.... everything was fine I would've fight for you with anyone your friends my friends and not that I didn't fight I did but I can't fight with myself love I can't fight with myself coz at the end that's what I've for real.... I'm gonna work on myself and just be better version of myself I'LL be a women Noone can ever hurt n I'm just gonna be strong... no matter how hard things are.... n Ik Sam you cared I'm afraid of darkness you were there for me you hold my hand you protect me but I was really hurt when you left n I'm sorry I can't work things out I'm healed from the pain you've given me so tbh you presence and absence is not even bothering... you text I reply I'm just using you till the exam tbh just for clarifying my doubts you don't matter to me anymore.... n I'll move on from you I can sleep at night without texting you a long message I curse you I curse us but in the morning I woke up I just make myself realise he's gone and I'll accept the fact sooner or later you're gone...
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