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*ahem* I have something embarrassing that I don't want to ask anyone that I know. I might as well go out with it.
How should I ask my partner to like, be more dominant sometimes? I'm a bit of a switch, so I adapt to my partner. However, I usually dom him. It's just, you know- it's super destroying of my dignity to even ponder this. I mean, sure. I'm a soft boy and all, but I won't a bit of hair pulling and commanding me what to do. I especially want to figure this out because we're trying to be more open in that area. I don't always like physical touch, so I'm adventuring into a whole new world here. Anyway, how should I go about this?
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Is it okay when your boyfriend reacts to his college friends profile pictures like bikini pictures? I felt a bit disgusted with him.. Need your advice....
I have an idea 💡
So, say to him you think it would be fun to both write down a description of something new you want to try in bed. You exchange letters and read them to yourselves so you can dial down the embarrassment as much as possible. Then agree to burn, or otherwise destroy the letters together. And ask each other if you agree to do the things. And if you both agree.. then do them!
Replythis is much better than the 3 novel tangent i went on. use this one op its so cute and creative and fun and saucy
ReplyNo offense intended, but I had this exact same issue with my girlfriend when we first began exploring "that" area of our lives (I'm a girl, too, by the way.)
She was still a little vanilla because she just had some random epiphany that she liked girls about a week before we began dating, but I always knew I was a little bit fruity since grade school.
This entire thing is embarrassing to say, but if it will help at all, I will gladly share the entire timeline of my sex life. Anyway, I'm getting sidetracked.
I like being a sub, but my girlfriend is too nice. She wouldn't hurt a fly. If someone was manhandling her, she would let them. She's really that passive. Once I texted her while she was at work (because I didn't want to tell her face to face) "would you dom me" and she replied with "maybe......." and a confetti emoji. So, progress.
Then I started texting her pictures of BDSM items I found on Amazon to see how she would react. Then, like, a week later, she told me that she bought all the things I sent pictures of to which I replied "lol" because I wanted her to but I wasn't expecting her to, you know?
Tl;dr: You /have/ to destroy your dignity. Just ask him, what's the worst that could happen? You develop skin cancer? If he's by any means a sane man, he will appreciate your talking to him about it. And if that doesn't work out, (which it probably will; I'm rooting for you and nobody I've rooted for has ever failed) there has to be /some/ man out there that will dom you. Hell, even I would dom you. What am I actually saying anymore.
I hope this helped even a smidge. This took me eight years to write so I hope at least one word of this was helpful. Good luck :)
Replywhy did i start this sentence with no offense? That doesnt even make sense. im really tirwd
ReplyThanks, guys. This is all seriously helpful!!! Y'all have a great day or night.
"3 novel tangent" XD
ReplyYou just gave me more faith in humanity my friend. Most people don't even think about having these talks with their partner(s) they just cheat. More power to you two, and I hope it all works out
ReplyDamn, there are so many awesome people in the world. Thank you, Wolf.
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