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I ADMITTED TO BEST FRIEND I HAD FEELINGS (when they had a date lined up)
1 year ago · 3 · Friends, +2
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I am a guy and my best friend (girl) told me she had a date with someone from online. I became emotionally distraught and scared and they could tell something was wrong. So I told them I had a crush on them and they told me they want to be friends but it can't be anything more than that. I told them I needed some space to grief and heal. They understood. It's only been a few days but I miss them like crazy and have depressive episodes because I feel like I blew what could've been something special
We have known each other for 7 years and after falling out during lockdown we picked up where we left off. We are super close; hanging out almost every weekend, messaging each other every day and sharing the same bed when staying.over.
I can't help but feel my timing and circumstances in telling them my feelings ruined something special. Rather than on the many outings and trips we've been on I tell her out of fear when she has a date with someone. Maybe I look desperate or she's mad at My timing
I don't have many friends and the acquaintances I have just don't fulfill new emotionally and mentally the same way she does. I literally feel like everything is ok when I talk to her and I miss her like crazy.
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ReplyYou are both young and there is still plenty of time for you two to get together.
ReplyNo you’re alright. You didn’t do anything wrong. I saw your first post asking about what to do. I think you did the right thing because otherwise you’d be wondering if things would’ve panned out differently had you done something. It’s better to have the closure to move on than to stew over ‘what if’s. It’s okay to miss them, but you didn’t mess anything up. If they’re you’re friend, I’m sure they understand. I did something very similar in late March with a very close friend of four years. Turns out he had been seeing a new girl recently who I didn’t know about. We didn’t talk at all until May, both clearly trying to give the other space, but now we’re back to chatting again maybe once every two weeks. It can slowly open up again, but don’t hold your breath. I’ll be honest and say I missed him like crazy all the time in the time between and still do sometimes, but he gave me space and a chance to live in peace knowing it wouldn’t work out. It may work out later, but it won’t work out right now, and that’s the important bit. Figure out what will work right now. I decided to treat myself after that happened with learning a new skill I’d been putting off (in my case, finally learning some French). I did my first painting in years. It takes me a long time and I’m not that good, but that’s not the point. I found contentment within myself. And weirdly enough, I got asked on a date last night by a friend who had been crushing on me while I was crushing on the first guy. So who knows, maybe it’s a blessing in disguise that you won’t be hung up on them in the future when you can move on. I’d be missing out on an awesome chance with my other friend had I still been attached that way to the first. I wish you the best in life and I hope you can give yourself the happiness you were ready to give her. You’re worth that
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