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ok so bear with me because i promise it will be worth it
so i live in a pretty safe neighborhood and there's my next door neighbors
they have a girl (lets call her m) that's a few years younger than me
anyways my sister and i would always go to her house to hang out since she has a pool and she would come to my house like normal friends
well like 4 years ago, m's dad sadly passed away from a heart attack
and we went to his funeral and hugged the mom and m and it was sad
but here's where things start to get weird...
the mom all of a sudden became like super protective over m
to the point where she literally believed that there were these "people" shining lasors into her house at night and sneaking around the backyard
trying to "steal valuable things inside"
she got the police involved and emailed our whole neighborhood to look out
trust me if there were people shining lasors at night i would see them
so she's just making that up
it gets worse
she then said that these "people" were changing her locks and breaking in
and "scratching her furniture" which is totally fake
she started to put up no trespassing signs up on the divide between my house and their house
and security cameras EVERYWHERE but mainly pointing to the divide
another one of my neighbors one day told us that the mom told her that she thinks me and my sister are the ones responsible for everything
which again, is totally a lie
the mom then went around telling the nearby neighbors her suspicions and now they all hate us (which is sad cuz they were super friendly)
the mom would randomly ask my dad to meet up and "talk" to try and get him to say we were the ones responsible even though we weren't
one day they were talking by the divide
and my dog had to pee, so i took her out by the leash
then the mom said to my dad "what is your daughter doing hiding behind the bushes"
like huh?
sorry i'm letting my dog pee
to make matters worse, the mom was thinking (idk anymore) about sending m to the SAME SCHOOL as us
anyways
our other neighbor that's been keeping us updated said the mom thinks now we're breaking into her wifi and hacking her passwords
so that's fun
they also have a dog that they never let out anymore
like i haven't seen it go outside in YEARS
and i haven't seen m either in so long
i think the mom forces her to stay inside
which is really sad since she deserves to have a life
my parents have been thinking of calling protective services
to do a check up but idk if that will only make things worse
i'm just really worried for her and idk if she's safe with the mom
the mom doesn't seem to be in the right state of mind to care about her child
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The mother has gone paranoid and needs psychiatric help. If you don't want to continue living like this I suggest you move.
ReplyIt can be a really common response to losing a family member, that a parent becomes Super protective of their remaining family. That's totally understandable.
What isn't as easy to understand is M's Mom's raging paranoia.
I suppose if something so unexpected and bad could happen to her husband, like a fatal heart attack, and she was powerless to prevent his death, and now feels vulnerable and alone without his presence... well, it makes sense that she would feel a strong need for control in her life, and to protect herself against outside threats.
I'm so sorry that she's making you and your sister the focus of her deranged feelings. These weird goings-on are clearly real to her, even if they're completely unhinged. Grief can make people behave strangely, but there is really no excuse for demonising two children. Her behaviour is actually quite alarming. What's also quite alarming to me is that the adults in your life aren't sticking up for you - wtf, Dad??
I can understand an adult not wanting to further upset a grieving widow, but he shouldn't have let you take the blame after she accused you of burglary or whatnot.
You need to talk to your parents about your concerns for M, and also about the way her mom has turned the neighbours against you. It's not OK for her to continue spreading these malicious rumours. Your parents could try talking to the police, since they have already had contact with M's mom and heard her story about the intruders - and explain about her strange behaviours since that time (police are not usually good people to call for situations involving mental health, but if she's harassing you, you should get that documented). They could also try getting some advice from a mental health organisation about how to approach this situation where a paranoid neighbour is potentially isolating her kid. Protective services might also be a good idea at this point - you're worried about M's safety and wellbeing.
I really hope the grown-ups will be able to sort this out, but I also hope that you'll be able to re-establish contact with M - if her mom's keeping her isolated and ranting about intruders, this must be a pretty lonely and anxious experience for her. She deserves to know that she still has friends, and that her mom isn't right about all the scary stuff she believes has been happening since her husband died.
This is such a difficult situation, and I'm sorry you're having to go through all this unpleasantness.
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