What are you looking for?
Featured Topics
Select a topic to start reading.
of all the lies i have ever lived, my favourite was you and i. we were such a perfect mess. such a beautiful lie. the type that you tell in order to save someone’s feelings. “yes that dress looks wonderful!” the type that you probably shouldn’t tell, but you do, because you don’t know what else to do during the moment. you’re unable to escape the moment so you live it. you live the lie as a truth to the best of your abilities because you crave it to be a truth. for the impossible to be possible. tiny, impossible us. with a mind field of stars above us. a universe full of others. bustling streets, crying children, laughing people. it’s strange to think of everyone and their minuscule lives. how we will never know the backstory of that pregnant lady who walked passed us in coles. how we will never know her highs and lows. her darkest nights and brightest mornings. or the story of the harvey norman employee you took out your pent up annoyance on when your closest store sold out of iphone chargers. humans are generally so self concerned. did you take a moment to ask his name? or to carefully and genuinely ask how his day has been? because i certainly didn’t. I chucked him your ordinary, disinterested “gday” and then threw a tantrum, because why, in gods name, are they sold out of iphone chargers? i’ll admit without pride, but with distinction, that most of my daily interactions are tiny lies. “how are you?” “yeah i’m good, how are you?” “actually i was lying - my life is falling to pieces and i struggle to get up in the morning and everything feels like a burden.” no. i’m not going to say that because that sort of question doesn’t require the truth, in fact it often demands a lie. the smaller the lie the easier to tell. the bigger the lie, the harder to admit. i’ll be completely transparent and say that i don’t care at the moment. not about the pregnant lady or the harvey norman employee. not even on a fake, surface level. because i’m drowning in my own situation and circumstances that i have no false politeness or niceties left to show. the one thing i do care about, you, i can’t have. not without that other stupid thing… lying. a lie. lies. i’m beginning to think that i live nothing but lies. i don’t speak in english i speak in lies. i find it easier. i don’t trust anyone anymore. it would be easier to blame you for that, but that would also be a lie. i’ll always be responsible for my own actions, words and emotions. the one thing i do know, the one truth i’m sure of, is that our time together, your motivations, intentions, will forever be my favorite lie.
If you see a comment that is unsupportive or unfriendly, please report it using the flag button.
More Posts
-
why
why did i say that? why did i do that? i never wanted anything bad now i die a little bit inside. why would they say that? why would she post that? all i...
-
Fireworks
Even when I vow myself of no emotion Pretend they're not there I still sense them like small explosions Quiet yet so loud fireworks in a distant sky...
That was beautiful.
Reply