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Hi. Im a 13 year old girl from malaysia. I never thought going to a new school was hard because all i want was to be the same school with my friend again. Knowing that me and my best friend were not the same school. My mother basically never love the real me like the way i dress, the way i behave and so on. She basically push me over ever thing. I cant buy the thing that i truly love. My mother just try to change me to be like her. My mother always make me feel bad at every possible way even though she doesn't know ever time she speak badly about me,i get me hurt. I remember it even if she didn't meant it. Yes im a middle child if you dont consider my little. Speaking of sibling i have 1 big sister who older than me and 2 younger sister and brother. Before my brother born i was the middle one and i still am. My parents and my younger siblings except for me dont know that my sister is part of the lgbtq community but i am also but i never tell my family just my friends. I have a tomboy side of me where usually my mother dont like what me to turn me into a girly person which i never what to. My new school was ok but im just confuse if there someone who will match my energy the way my old best friend did. I also doing this because i dont what to do there were time where i want to kill myself. I never express my sad side to anyone except my very very close friend. I was always the listener. Like when my older sister express how she was feeling sad and depresse. I never cried i front of my mother anymore. I promise myself that if i was about to cry i think of happy things like how me and my best friend humor at the past or my comfort character. You may think that i make this for attention so whatever. You may also say what a 13 year old girl doing this. Yes im 13 and your probably an adult so please help me what should i do. I really need your help please. I just what to enjoy my teen and make sweet memories.
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Its normal to feel that way changing schools. I know you want a friend like you had and to make happy memories again. You just have to be patient. In time you will probably find a friend again to do that with. Its also ok to cry you don't have to hide your feelings crying helps you feel better sometimes even if nobody is around. Just try to be friendly with others maybe you'll come across the right person one or more kids for friends. Your mom is just probably trying to raise in how to be in what she thinks is right. Just keep going and give it some time. I hope you feel better.
ReplyI'd like to share my experience with you since we've many similarities (always felt hated by parents and siblings, middle child and different from others). I feel terrible for making my younger self go though so much anxiety and depression. Now at 22 I'm no longer normal, I hate human contact, don't have good relationship with parents, have no friends, no confident just anxiety and depression. I think you should talk to your mother and share about your feelings you're still young it's normal for kids to do so, I'm sure your mom loves u and once they get to know about your anxiety they'll help you. Don't stress your little mind too much, you're loved some parents just don't have parenting skills that doesn't mean they hate us.
ReplyAnd regarding changing schools? That's another similarity we've, I'd just advise u to be confident and engage in class as much as u can, don't hide or try to get into some popular kid's good books mjust go with the flow but be confident and stand up in class to initiate conversations when asked.. Don
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