Thoughts

Yet another part to the movie that is my life. Dad says now he remembers NOTHING about Friday/Saturday night when I took him to my cousin's. He was super drunk I suppose.

My cousin and his wife were both smoking weed and drinking. They all and dad were passing around a joint. I felt so out of place. My cousins like "did you ever start smoking yet?" I didn't say anything. Just said in driving its not a good idea for me to do it. They had to hint twice WERE GETTING TO GO OUT TO EAT for dad to comprehend it. I can't believe he remembers nothing. Yet another memory I have to live with he magically has no memory of from downing almost a bottle of pills. Yeah well his consequences are coming because he's going to be COMPLETELY out. That's his foolishness. Him also one day saying g d this whole fking family.

Ok presently Last night was hell for me. I had both a headache and toothache at the same time. I was in agony. Feels like I have some form of flu sickness or something I don't feel good. Burning lungs a bit, headache, feeling fatigued. I wear a mask EVERYWHERE Idk what I did wrong to get sick I wash my hands 20 times a day as a germaphobe. Idk. My whole body hurts last night too I wished id never been born I don't wish that suffering on anybody. Thank God im better than I was. I slept little. Dad had to cuss and yell at mom saying" I get tired of eggs and biscuits everyday". She's like don't cuss me don't talk to me if we can't get along. He's like I DIDN'T CUSS YOU. funny I heard it all it woke me up. I don't get back to sleep easily. Idk about this family. Another memory I gotta live with he don't remember. Just cuz I don't smoke weed that's my choice it don't make me less of a person than they. Ivehad my share of smoking it its not my thing.

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