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Your actions do not match your words and nothing ever matches what your eyes say.
Your words, slightly callus and scared of feelings and general emotion, are painful at times. You claim to not want love, that it's a trap and a scam. The concerns you have, the choices you make and the goals you set are not particularly encouraging. They all tell my brain to run, run far and never look back
Your actions, though, are much warmer. They are kind and tender. The way you care for others, making an effort to include people. You saw my hurt and held me when others didn't, wouldn't. Your silent acts of humanity are bright, unexpected and cause me to look in curiosity. What is your motive when you do these things?
Then we get to your eyes. You did it once that I caught. You looked at me.
You
Looked
At
Me
For someone who says eye contact is uncomfortable, you locked and held a gaze. In those moments I want to hold onto you, to squeeze you and close my eyes while I listen to your heart beat in your chest.
The kindness I see, the softness of your eyes when you see something you care about and are worried. Potential, unlimited. But is what I'm seeing true? Is it real, or am I reading into lying eyes? Eyes telling me to have hope while knowing that nothing lies beyond the iris.
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