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To make a long story, shirt I have been with my husband for 12 1/2 years. I am a mother to a 6yr boy, almost 4yr old girl and my bonus baby girl is 15.
I have not been on vacation since I was a teenager ( I'm 32) I have been, as well as my family has been going through A LOT of stress. A LOT of heartache and ALOT of transitions. My parents are avid crushers. I was invited, free of charge to take a 5 day cruise and 10 day vacation all together. I got work off, I'm going with my parents and my sister and that's it.
I made my decision without speaking to my husband because at that point we were going to separate and get a divorce. I am the one who works and he is the stay at home parent. My hubby is a narcissist and controlling. Has been out entirety together. He isnt fond of my parents, especially my dad. I knew his answer would be No and I wasn't allowed to go...the trip is in t minus 10 days. I haven't brought it back-up even though I gave him almost 4 months notice. It's been a Rollercoaster of Hell since.
I haven't spent more than 24 hours away from my children since birth. The 24 I was gone, I was having my daughter. I have also not had time apart from him for lost 4 1 /2 years. How can i miss someone if they are never gone? Ive already went through a mental breakdown last year. I just NEED a break. Ive already set it up to where he could take his own Breakation once I get back. But now I'm a liar, pos, too selfish, and a bad mother for "abandoning" my children.
It's like a battle I cannot win. Am I too selfish for wanting a break? Or wanting to experience something I've never got to do? Just having adult time with my parents and sister?
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Aww mom, you need that vacation, badly. Sometimes our children need a break from us too. Talk with the littles about your trip, this will help them understand were mom went. You could print/make them a calendar to mark the days till you come back, and maybe tell them in the future they can take a similar style trip with you when older.
As for the narc, he just mad cuz you are finally taking care of you. You are already divorcing so the kicking and screaming will naturally increase towards the finalization. Even so, with all the turmoil and tension, he will benefit from your absence as well. Good luck,peace to you
ReplyIn my opinion I do not think you are selfish for needing some time. Of course your kids are important and you should not want to rid of them, but you are not doing that at all! You are trying to get some time away from life, everyone needs an escape once in a while. You not only have a lot of stress with kids, I can only imagine the tension in your relationship adds to the amount of stress you already have. I think taking a break with your parents and sister will be like going back to when you were a kid, you’ll come back better than ever and happy to be with your kids :)
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